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Where the hell did I put my phone? The damn thing always seems to hide itself from me.
“Just… good lights. In the ceiling.” “That is technical,” Gray drawls. “No wonder you thought I wouldn’t get it. Hey, as a lighting expert, what are those things called in the ceiling of my office? I’ve been referring to them as little suns and asking the maintenance to fuel my tiny suns every time one of them burns out, and then I yell a star is born when it shines again in the morning.”
“I’ll end up with a boatload of, I don’t even know… chairs that’ll remind me of my failure for years to come. Eventually I’ll start conversing to the chairs because I’m so bitter and lonely, and before you know it, I’ll start treating them as my children, and you’ll start receiving Christmas cards from me and my family of chairs. I’ll die surrounded by my chair children, and you’ll have to transport them all to my funeral and set them up next to the grave, which is both sad and convenient because my human mourners, the few there might be, can sit on my kids.”
“Sure,” I say. “I know the meaning of the words you just said. Amazing flufferguts, indeed. Top-notch work.”
Oh. Right. Gray sad. Need Kai to make stuff better.
“March has disguised itself as a spring month when in reality, it’s the dying cry of winter.”
Commence operation Erection-What-Erection-I-Felt-Nothing. Code name EWEIFN, for short.
Crazy town has officially arrived, and I’m campaigning to be the mayor.
I’m getting a whole new perspective on the troubles Hulk faces with his anger issues.
“You put on Coldplay. The sexiest of all musics! J’accuse!”
“I especially enjoyed the part where you stood above him while he was lying on the ground and you had that whole speech about how redheads are more efficient at synthesizing vitamin D than other people, so that’s why I was a happy person and Brett was a miserable ass.”
