First Flight, Final Fall

by C.W. Farnsworth

“You’re the sexiest fucking thing I’ve ever seen.”

I always keep score. Because I hate losing. Because I like to know where I stand with people, and especially with guys. And because Adler Beck is the furthest thing from a sure bet.

“You’re fucking fantastic at football, Saylor.”

Adler Beck is a terrible idea because I suddenly know with absolute certainty that if I let myself, I could care about him. Like him. Maybe even love him.

“Doing some team bonding?” “We’re practicing a different kind of shots.”

“You’re the most dedicated—not just talented—player I’ve ever coached. That will take you far, you understand me? You’ve got confidence on the field, but I also get the feeling not many people have told you this. Some players are talented. Others work hard. But it’s rare—extremely rare—to have both, to never lose the drive to be better. Keep at it, and there won’t be anyone left to surpass, Scott. I’m expecting to one day be known by nothing aside from the fact that I coached you for a summer.”

“You’re not millions of other people to me.”

“Otto hung a sign that says, ‘Saylor Scott’s Inspiration’ above my locker.”

You don’t gossip about Adler Beck when he’s standing in front of you—you stare at him.

“You asked me why I came—you didn’t need to. You know the answer. I came to see you, Saylor.”

“A lot of women want you.” “I want you.”

“She’s not my type. I prefer strikers.” “She is a striker, Beck.” He shrugs. “I didn’t know that. Should tell you everything you need to know.”

I’m cynical, but I’m not certain of collapse. Because of Beck. Because…he makes me believe happy endings might be real. And I wish he was here, instead of so far away, so I could tell him that.

“Does that mean you didn’t change your mind?” “Change my mind about what?” “About me. About wanting me.” He doesn’t reply right away, so I brace myself for the worst. “I’m never going to change my mind about wanting you, Saylor.”

“I don’t want to go skydiving with you, Saylor. I want to be the person you rely on when you’re acting like you can do everything on your own.”

“The logistics don’t really matter. The point is, I love Saylor. I want her to achieve everything she’s ever dreamed. And I want to be next to her when she does. I want her to know I’ll be there, no matter what happens.”