Saint (Sigma Sin #1)

by Eva Simmons

“Why?” “Why what?” “Why me?” He pauses, biting the inside of his cheek and narrowing his eyes as he examines me. “Because you look beautiful when you break.”

If he’s twisted, I’m no better. If he’s sick, I’m terminal.

“Stunning, kitten.” He grips my hip and pulls me to him as he thrusts in. “Does it hurt bleeding for me?”

“That won’t stop me.” He hits me deep again and presses just the tip of his thumb into my ass as he does. “I’m going to fuck you here next, even if you beg me not to. You’re going to take me any way I want because you’re mine, Violet. You gave yourself to me.”

“You’re mine,” he repeats. “Even if I have to bleed dry any man who so much as looks at you. I’ll send their parts to you one by one just to remind you what I’m willing to do for you.”

“I’m going to have so much fun with you, kitten.”

Violet is beautiful when she’s broken. Broken by me.

For a girl as smart as she is, she’s dumb enough to search for my affection.

“Right and wrong are like emotion; they exist on a spectrum and shift depending on how you define them. You want me to hurt you. That’s why you didn’t immediately run from me in the forest. So then, is it really wrong?”

He carved himself into my skin and embedded himself into my soul. I still taste his blood on my tongue and feel his grip on my throat.

“That includes me. I’m yours, kitten. Only yours.”

“I don’t know, Violet. What am I other than being yours anymore?” he asks. “You feel better than any kill. Your fear tastes unlike any hunt. There is no gratification without you. And I can’t fucking get enough.”

My vision darkens with his gaze, and I can’t fight it. I can’t think. I can’t breathe. My body unravels, and I’m leaves in the wind, breaking free and floating away. And Saint is my forest. My maze. My purgatory.

Most people think chaos is unpredictable. But that’s only because they aren’t smart enough to read patterns—to understand cause and effect. Chaos never looks like chaos at first. It starts as something simple. Something sturdy. Chaos is stability tipped an inch too far in one direction.

One day, we’ll sit down and dig into all of them, but if she doesn’t take small bites, she won’t be able to swallow all the truths I could offer.

“You’re dripping just imagining what I’m going to do to you. Lustful when you should fear me. Your perfect little cunt begs for my pain.”

“You. Are. Mine.” He grabs my chin, standing over me. “I proved it to them, and if you want to test me, I’m more than happy to prove it to you.”

Worse, could you handle someone standing at my side and holding my hand thinking I’m hers when you know, even if you hate yourself for it, that I belong to you?”

“I suffered for you, Violet.” He pushes the crown in, and I’m immediately overcome with the same rush from our first night together. “And you’re going to thank me for it.”

“Scream for me, kitten.” He thrusts in harder, and the cold edge of the table painfully digs into my hips. “Hurt for me. I won’t kill you, but I will make you suffer like I did.”

“Your Saint.” My Saint. My devil.

Kole letting Declan into that room with us wasn’t punishment. It wasn’t even jealousy. It’s the only way he knows how to hold onto someone—by clinging so tight everything around them shatters. He doesn’t understand emotion or how to vocalize to Declan to stay away from me, so he uses physical examples instead. Pain. Sex.

Kole’s methods of caring hurt both of us.

But instead of pulling away when he holds my throat tighter, I rest my hand on his chest. I place my trust in his palms. Knowing that whatever he...

Kole presses his mouth to mine and steals my life. He breaks my heart and rips my thoughts to shreds. He forces my lips to part with his tongue and devours everything I have. It’s simple. It’s complicated.

My hand wraps her throat to remind her I’m her air. I’m her life. I could crush her windpipe without much effort.

My fingers grip her throat tighter, and she loses her breath. Just for a second. Just for me.

I could spend all night licking every inch of her skin because now that I have her, I want to taste her, to consume her, to breathe her and only her for the rest of my pointless life. She’s mine. And I’m never letting her be anyone else’s again.

I sink against his body and let him be the air that I’ve been seeking. My lungs take in every atom of his soul when he parts his lips and forces his tongue into my mouth. And my bones crave him unlike anything I’ve ever needed.

“I told you, Violet, I only have one weakness: you. They can carve me up all they like, and it won’t mean shit. You’re the only one who can actually hurt me.”

He’s sick. Psychotic. The killer he was bred to become. And I’m falling in love with him.

“No gods here, kitten. Remember? Only your Saint.”

“And if you’re lucky, maybe when we’re done, I’ll remind you why your dark little heart enjoys my blasphemy.”

He hits me deep, over and over. “No one is going to take you from me.” Confessions. Manifestations.

“Do you want to pray for me, Violet?” he whispers in my ear. “Do you want to get on your knees and beg the Lord’s forgiveness for my sins? Or are you worried he’ll condemn you for your own?”

“Don’t worry, kitten. There’s nothing to be afraid of. I’m not going anywhere. I’ll protect you. Even from God himself.”

Just because I don’t believe in damnation doesn’t mean I won’t offer it to him here on earth. These walls will be his church, and I will cast judgment upon him. I’ll slice the repayment of his sins from his bones. Flay them off. Count them down until I’m left with one. He. Touched. Her.

“I don’t know how to love you right,” Kole says, brushing his fingers along my jawline and tracing it the same way he traced my scars. “But I love you every way I know how. Because you are everything to me. I’d die for you.”

“Such a greedy little slut, coming for your Saint.” He fucks me, holding deep. “Squeezing my cock like a dirty whore. Be a good cunt and milk my cum out of me.”