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Welcome to the downside of cheating: apparently, you don’t learn anything.
That’s another point for the stupid column when it comes to crushes. All your good sense goes out the window. Who the hell passes on an orgasm just to hang out with someone platonically?
Maybe our friendship was never meant to be about shared orgasms, and instead, it’s all about me finding some fucking perspective in life. A well-rounded Dalton? That Dalton being me? Nah, sounds false. He’ll make me a good person when I’m dead.
I, however, see no blow jobs in my future. I pour the rest of my beer out onto the floor and toss the Solo cup after it. I’m in peak dick mode, but I can’t stop myself. Sure, I’m not the most pleasant person most of the time, but my bad moods usually pass quickly—Em helps with that—but this time, it’s clung on like herpes.
“Go see him. Talk to him.” I groan as I think about what I sent him last night. “He’ll probably punch me in the face.” “Eh. At least then you’ll have something new to complain about.” “Fuck you, I don’t complain.” “Not out loud.” He kicks his sheets off. “But your face is loud, and I’m sick of listening to it.”

