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November 26 - December 12, 2019
Cheers to the Clichés! Watching The Bachelor or The Bachelorette at home and want your own cocktail party booze-fest? Drink anytime someone says: 1. I didn’t come here to make friends. 2. We have a strong connection. 3. I feel like my wall is up. 4. [Insert name] threw me under the bus. 5. The words “journey” or “process.” 6. [Insert name] isn’t here for the right reasons. 7. I came here to find love. 8. I could be going home tonight. 9. I’m falling in love with more than one woman. 10. This is the hardest decision I’ve ever made in my life. 11. I can
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That night while we were sleeping, exactly eight hours after we took the laxatives, Casey and I each had our own private nightmares. How can I put this politely? Okay, combine the toilet scene in Dumb and Dumber with the wedding dress shop scene in Bridesmaids and multiply it by infinity. I was sharing a bed with Rachel when all of a sudden I broke out in a cold sweat and my stomach started gurgling uncontrollably—like a geyser about to blow. I didn’t want to gross out Rachel by going in the loo in our room, so I ran like a maniac across the hotel suite with my butt cheeks squeezed to find the
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while Ben stated as fact on numerous occasions that “there are no chains” in his hometown of San Francisco (a quick Google search shows at least three Victoria’s Secrets in the metropolitan area alone).
It’s funny how you repeat behavior, even when you know it’s bad for you, because it’s the only thing you know. It’s like a comfortable misery.
