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“What is this?” I had asked her. “It is a record of Locris, our home. Of stories that have been banned and forgotten. Words about the goddess, who we used to praise with songs and prayers. Until she cursed us and our land, destroying her own temple.”
“You will be the one to carry this legacy forward. You will keep the word. Someone in Locris must remember the old ways, how we worshipped the goddess, and find a way to regain her favor to restore our lands. Your older sister will marry and leave. Your brother will be beholden to the law and his people. But you? You will have a choice about your life’s path. And you should choose to remember what was and what might be.”
“You must always remember that all the answers you need are in the written word,” she continued. “In scrolls, in poems, in songs, in books. Find the right words and you will have your answer.”
A single line in the book had caught my attention and changed the entire course of my life. Only the eye of the goddess can restore Locris.
We subsisted on so little here in our desert kingdom that it was difficult to remember that others routinely had access to so much more than we did.
And as soon as I saw his face, my heart whispered, Oh, there you are. I’ve been waiting for you.
I wondered who had cut his face and if it would be all right if I stabbed them for it.
My body’s reaction to him was the same as if I were about to fight. My heart raced, my skin tingled in anticipation, my blood pumped hard through my body, my breathing became difficult to manage. It was hard to keep a clear head.
I had often wondered what it would be like to wield magic, and I couldn’t imagine that it was much different from this—the magic two people could create just by kissing. It was almost otherworldly.
His voice was rough and deep. “I would have come here a long time ago if I had known that all Locrian women were so welcoming to Ilionian men.”
“Are you sure this is the only way?” she asked. I supposed she had to make at least one final attempt. I patted her hand. “Now more than ever.”
This was another aspect that had always bothered me. This belief that women were special enough to be pleasing to the goddess, but that we were ultimately easy to discard and unimportant. Strong enough to be slaughtered but not important enough to fight for.
And so it had fallen to me to step forward. I would fight. I would change the curse and the fate of every woman destined to follow by myself.
I knew my mother didn’t want to lose another child. But I didn’t intend to be lost.
“The code says that there is no honor in a man who rushes to war because he doesn’t care if he dies. There is valor in battle for those who desire to live. Courage can only exist in the same space that fear does.”
“Stupid girl.” Demaratus had never said those words to me in that tone before. He was usually angry and shouted them at me. Now they were soft, sweet. There was so much emotion in his voice—regret, concern, and something that felt like love.
“Try not to die.”
He had saved us, but all I could think about was that if a sailor could fight like that, what hope would Quynh and I have against the trained citizenry of Troas?
I would not allow him to distract me further.
Why was I drawn to such dangerous and deadly things?
We were no longer safe. My mother wasn’t here to watch over us. And we had every reason to fear the dark.
I would channel all my hurt, my loss, my suffering, my pain into anger. Vengeance.
And for the briefest of moments, it felt like the leaves were responding to my touch. Calling to me. Euthalia.
There was a humming in the ground, a vibration I could feel. Was this the healing she had spoken of? This sensation that seemed to travel up through my fingers and spread throughout all my limbs? Or was it something else?
“Who taught you to fight?” she asked incredulously. I realized that I hadn’t been taught to fight. I’d been taught to avoid the fight. To escape situations like this. Artemisia had clearly been trained differently than I had—she went on the offensive and never let up. Who had trained her?
I had honestly believed that once I reached the temple of the goddess, I would be safe. That it would be a sanctuary. I had never once considered the danger that waited here for me.
“Sometimes you’ll have a healthy plant where a stem or leaves have died. The plant’s instinct is to divert all of its energy to restoring the lost parts, which inhibits its growth. And so, as the gardener, you have to cut those pieces away so that there can be new leaves, new flowers, new life. Sometimes you have to brush away the parts of your life that no longer serve you so that you can move forward.”
Even I was caught up in it. I made myself a vow. Never again. Never again would I allow a Locrian maiden to run that race. I would find a way to stop it. No more sacrifices.
I thought of how when I’d first arrived, I had planned to use these women to get what I wanted. To befriend them and take the information that I needed. But they had offered me everything that I wanted and more. These women were my sisters, my friends.
I waited, my limbs trembling. Instead she gave me a slight smile. Time for things to change.
How had this fight been so easy? As much as I wanted to give the credit to Antiope and her methods, this hadn’t been only because of my training. I had been equal to these men in strength and speed. Because they were drunk? I wasn’t sure. All I did know was that it had been different from any other fight I’d had against men before.
“I’m pleased to see your old blade again.” “Jason?”
“Who did it?” he demanded in a tone that implied he was going to hunt those people down and make them suffer. A thrill rang through me at his unspoken threat.
Yeeeesssssss
I had heard him say that exact same sentence before. I prefer the freedom of going wherever I wish, whenever I wish. Only he’d said it to me in a dream. That caused a chill to settle into my spine, spreading slowly through me. I’d told him I didn’t believe in coincidences. So what did it mean that he was saying things in real life that he’d said to me only in my imagination?
And how many reminders did I need about the kind of man he was? He couldn’t have made it any clearer. Why was I attracted to him?
He placed his hands against his chest. “Is it my fault that you’re so fascinating that I have to understand everything about you?”
He was so close that I could smell him, and he was an intriguing combination of leather, honey, salt, and something else. It might have been my fevered brain, but I would have sworn that I detected the faint scent of irises. Like the goddess had marked him just for me.
“Why are you laughing?” I demanded. “You . . . punching a goose . . . I will never forget it.” He could barely get the words out.
Did he not feel this? This sparking energy between us, like lightning was flashing and filling the entire room with heat and light? Overwhelming and terrifying all at the same time?
We fit together so well. As if we’d been made for one another.
“I like how ordinary things seem special through your eyes.”
I was past caring about any of that. I forgot everything and everyone else. I shifted my gaze up to his lips. “I always pay my debts,” I told him.
“Why does kissing you always feel like swordplay?” I asked against his mouth, sighing the words. “And we haven’t even involved my sword yet.” He grinned back.
Fire raced up and down my veins, engulfing me. Jason seemed to burn just as brightly, just as hotly. His breathing was harsh, rapid. I clung to him, as if I were out at sea during a wicked storm, my boat destroyed, and all I could do was hold on to a piece of driftwood to keep breathing while the seas and skies raged all around me.
I had started out this morning thinking that I was completely alone. It was such a relief to discover that my sisters were ready and willing to stand by my side.
His eyes stared into mine with an intensity that I had never seen from him before. “When the time comes, you need to say yes.” “I don’t know what you mean.” “You will,” he promised.
All I could think about was that I had failed. I’d had my one chance and it had been for nothing.
If she hoped that this mission of hers would lead to our deaths, she was going to be bitterly disappointed.
I couldn’t give up. I was grateful I had a group of best friends who wouldn’t let me.
I was ready to follow wherever he wanted to go if it meant I would get to be with him. Ignoring the warning voice in my head, I let him lead me away.
