I Want to Die but I Still Want to Eat Tteokbokki: Further Conversations with My Psychiatrist (I Want to Die but I Want to Eat Tteokbokki)

by Baek Se-hee

And at work, I receive more stress from my interpersonal relationships than the work itself. It’s not like anyone bullies me or even pays me much attention, but I get so stewed up in my own thoughts that it stresses me out. I’m fine with getting stressed about the work, but the people stress? The competitiveness? How you have to keep changing and you must not be left behind? I keep thinking I want to be free from those things. Psychiatrist:I think you must learn to accept that everyone has such stresses, that no matter how much you’re enjoying your job, you will never be completely free from these things. That stress is inevitable. Even in your happiest moment, you can’t like absolutely everything about everything. It’s just that you happen to be feeling sturdy now, and a little knock here and there isn’t going to be enough to topple you, whereas before the smallest knock would’ve left a painful wound. Telling yourself something like, ‘What can I do to hurt less and minimise the suffering, surely I’m not the only one who’s hurting right now’ can help you along. Me:Accept it . . . I do feel stress about work, but I really like it, too. Even if I’m really anxious and unsure of my abilities and everyone else seems like a genius, I like the work a lot, despite the stress.