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“You’re fine. You’re okay. Do you want me to carry you the rest of the way?” She shakes her head, hugging her arms around her midsection.
That ivory pallor of hers has turned into a concerning shade of green. Oh, shit.
officially hit rock bottom. This is the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. Hayes should’ve left me at the bar to die.
This is the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. Hayes should’ve left me at the bar to die.
Hayes rubs soothing circles on my back, even holding my hair out of my face.
“You can come in,” I tell him in case he needs some kind of verbal confirmation. “You don’t know me. I’m not going to come inside your house.” I place two hands on my hips. “Are you a serial killer?” “No, but…” “Then you have my permission to come inside.”
I have a feeling that Hayes is a naturally stubborn person, but lucky for me, he stops resisting.
leg, and I look down through graying vision to pinpoint my tuxedo cat, Swiffer, nuzzling against me. And yes, she’s named after a Swiffer WetJet. Drunk me thought it would be hilarious when I first got her.
down through graying vision to pinpoint my tuxedo cat, Swiffer, nuzzling against me. And yes, she’s named after a Swiffer WetJet.
“If Roden saw me now, he’d be so disappointed.” I blink away the moisture on my lower lash line that’s threatening to leave streaky evidence through my foundation.
Cats are attuned to their owner’s emotions, right? God, this must be her way of pitying me.
“This guy I met, Hayes, he seems like a great guy. But I can’t let him in—not that I think I stand a chance with him after tonight,”
My heart aches like it’s been wrung out to dry, and there’s this unsettled flicker in my belly that I...
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“He’s beautiful. He really is. Oh, God. And I think I made a comment about his penis,” I mumble. “Like, yeah, I joked that it was small, but it looks a lot bigger than average.” “You think I’m beautiful?” I hear Hayes say from the bathroom doorway,
Hayes is a statue carved from the finest of marble. His lack of pants makes for a very clear show of the hard V-line he has, no doubt leading to a mouthwatering sight at the apex of his bulging thighs. The taut ripples of his abs glisten
He’s barrel-chested, and there’s tiny, illegible scripture scrawled above his left pectoral.
If Hayes deals with pain so well, I wonder where he exceeds in other departments. And don’t get me started on his ass. All I can make out are two soft dimples resting right above the juiciest globes I’ve ever seen.
“How much of that did you hear?” I hyperventilate. Laughter thunders in his chest. “Just the part about my apparently bigger-than-average dick.”
“Please ignore me. I’m heavily intoxicated right now. I don’t mean a word I’m saying,” I say, albeit the conviction sounds weak. His eyebrows jump to his hairline. “So you don’t think I have a bigger-than-average dick?”
“You’re adorable when you blush, you know that?” A flirtatious lilt skirts along his tone.
don’t have the best track record with guys. My last ex, Wilder Mason, was a manipulator, but I was so blindly in love with him that I tricked myself into making up excuses for the way he treated me. I thought it was normal for him to always ask me where I’d be and who I’d been with. I thought it was normal for him to regulate how much I ate and what I wore. I hate my body because of the way he treated me.
convince me that no guy would ever want a girl who wasn’t sex-crazy. I became Wilder’s puppet, his prisoner. He isolated me from all my friends, even my family.
Wilder promised me he’d always be there for me, no matter what happened. That he’d always love me. I’ve been chasing after love my entire life, wanting that gratification of meaning something to another person. But life doesn’t work that way. People don’t work that way. Wilder destroyed the hopeless romantic in me. He destroyed my hope for love.
And now I stay far away from any of those feelings because I already know how the story ends. I already know that heartache is waiting for me at the finish line.
I don’t think I’d survive another person abandoning me. First my brother, and then Wilder. The two people I loved most at one point in my life. I ha...
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you love too much, and that heap of sand weighs your chest down until you can’t breathe. Love isn’t black-and-white. It’s a murky gray, a bleak landscape devoid of effervescent life. And it’s my crucible.
Hayes sits down next to me, the mattress giving way to his weight. “You need to stop being so hard on yourself,” he chastises, startling me when he reaches out to hold my hand. The raised scars on his palm send a lance of electricity through my arm, but I don’t pull away.
“Why are you being so nice to me?” I blurt out, and the minute those words windmill out of me, I want to slap a return to sender sticker on them. Great. Good going, Aeris.
“Because you don’t know me.” “What’s your last name?” he asks, his voice sporting a warmth that’s enough to rid the goose bumps on my arms. “Relera. Why?” “I’m getting to know you, Aeris. Plus, I need to know the name of the beautiful girl who let me escort her home.”
“What do you do for work?” he continues. “I’m a social media content writer for a vegan company called Your Ass Is Grass,” I say, picking at my wrist. He cocks an eyebrow. “No way. Seriously? That’s the coolest thing I’ve ever heard,”
“What do you do for work?” His teeth lock in place, and he rubs the length of his neck. “I’m, uh…I’m a personal trainer.” That explains the muscles.
Ah, and the waterworks are right on time. Despondency wades through my bloodstream, subsequently siphoning all the air out of my lungs. My chest feels tight, my breath is bated, and tears swipe at the backs of my eyes.
“I know. I want to,” Hayes counters. “And I don’t scare easily.” You should
“You should probably get going after your clothes dry. I wouldn’t want to keep you.” Disappointment flashes across his features like a broken roll of film. “Right,” he agrees, though his mouth falls into a hard line.
The truth is, I don’t want Hayes to leave. I don’t want to be alone. Hayes is the first person since my brother’s death who’s made life feel a little less hopeless.
as much as I wouldn’t mind falling asleep in his arms, listening to the soft patter of his heart, I’m never going to allow myself...
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Bears don’t have to deal with feelings of inadequacy and hopelessness—at least, I don’t think they do.
Swiffer stares at me, hisses, then saunters out of the room. Little shit.
The second I step into the hallway, the intoxicating scent of maple bacon ambushes my nostrils, making my mouth water. Why do I smell bacon? Once I round the corner, I’m pleasantly surprised to find a blond giant hunched over my stove,
Hayes is in my kitchen, cooking me breakfast. Did I enter some parallel universe? This can’t be happening.
making the hem of his shirt ride up, exposing a sliver of washboard abs. The faint happy trail disappearing beneath the waistband of his pants magnetizes me. Dear Lord, give me strength. Make
Hayes finishes shoveling the last of the sizzling bacon onto a plate, his whole face lighting up as his gaze lands and softens on me. “You’re awake,” he chirps, loading up his arms with multiple dishes of breakfast foods.
“You didn’t. I went grocery shopping.” “You went grocery shopping?” He nods his head. “I’ve had my fair share of bad hangovers, and you seemed like you could use some cheering up.”
I don’t know what to say. I wish he hadn’t done any of this. If I’m around this much food, I can’t control my intake.
A dagger slips between my ribs at his sincerity—at the blatant concern in his tone. I feel like a terrible person. He spent all morning making this for me, and what am I supposed to say to him? Am I supposed to say, “Actually, Hayes, I usually only eat a banana for breakfast.
His face is crestfallen. “Shit, are you allergic to something?” I should’ve said yes. That would’ve been more than enough reason for me to avoid the breakfast. But my mind blanks, and I put my goddamn foot in my mouth. “I’m just not that hungry,”
God, the look on his face. He’s been nothing but kind to me, walking me home and cooking me breakfast, and this is how I repay him? A bite, Aeris. A bite couldn’t hurt, right?
“Actually, maybe I’ll eat just a little,” I acquiesce. He perks up immediately, rounding the table to take his own seat across from me, filling his plate to the brim with food like it’s an endless buffet.
There’s a blissed-out expression on his face as he slouches in his chair, relishing the sweet and salty tastes with quiet, contented moans. I don’t think I’ve ever experienced joy like that from eating.
“She was such a good cook. When I was younger, she taught me how to make all kinds of different breakfast foods for me and my sister. My favorite was her egg muffin recipe. Instead of ham, she’d put prosciutto in them. They were life-changing.”
