The Third Gilmore Girl

by Kelly Bishop

From childhood on, not wanting children was as unapologetic a fact about me as my ethnicity, and I was just as unapologetic about it as an adult, which put me on the receiving end of such mystifying reactions as “You don’t really know what it’s like to be a woman until you have children” and “Are you a lesbian?” Well, yes, I do, and no, I’m not, so take it or leave it.

I’m so lucky to be me, because I get to hang around with myself. It had nothing to do with ego and everything to do with a lifelong awareness that I’ve always enjoyed my own company.

If it’s the right dream for you and it allows you to support yourself, so that you’re not pursuing your dream at someone else’s expense, it will probably last a lifetime. If it stops being enjoyable and fulfilling and you fall out of love with it—if it starts feeling like drudgery to the point where it becomes painful and depressing—there’s nothing wrong with saying, “Okay, what else do I want to do with my life?” and start pursuing that dream.

I strongly believe that there’s a satisfying field, a job, a career for everyone—it’s just a matter of finding it, and the best way to do that is to head in the direction of what you love, whether it’s the performing arts, or flower arranging, or farming, or plumbing, or whatever. Aren’t we lucky that there’s such a wide variety of dreams to choose from, and so many people who choose them?

If it’s in you, it’s out there waiting for you.”