Ready Player One (Ready Player One, #1)

by Ernest Cline

Going outside is highly overrated. —Anorak’s Almanac, Chapter 17, Verse 32

I’d heard that dropcops had a nickname for this procedure—cutting an indent out of a fortified residence so they could arrest him. They called it doing a C-section.

A dude just ahead of me in line actually had a top-of-the-line miniature Sinatro OASIS console concealed inside a prosthetic testicle. Talk about balls.

“Goddammit!” he shouted. “Well, what am I supposed to do with it now?” “You could shove it up your ass and pretend you’re a corn dog.”

It occurred to me then that for the first time in as long as I could remember, I had absolutely no desire to log back into the OASIS.