Impromptu Match (Goliaths of Wrestling, #1)

by Lily Mayne

I’d typed out the word ‘synergy’ so many times in the last twelve years that it appeared in my dreams. I still didn’t even really know what it meant, and at this point I was too afraid to ask.

This is me but with the phrase “municipal”.

Or maybe it was the ice cream-eating muscles that had given up. Now I was picturing a nice, hard dick covered in ice cream, and I was getting a sad boner.

🤣🤣🤣

Are you, Mindy? Are you really glad, or is your eye twitching slightly as you eat it because deep down, you know lemon cake is what the devil would choose to torture all the damned souls in hell with? Oh god, maybe this was hell. And Sharon from Accounts was the devil.

The directors prefer there to be synergy across all our public-facing outputs to really leverage the HutSec brand, you know?” Was I having a stroke?

I’m cackling.

“He specifically requested—” He squinted down at his clipboard. “‘—sad office worker forced to attend a colleague’s birthday party.’ I mean, that’s clearly you.” I reared back in outrage. How dare he? It didn’t matter how painfully accurate it was, it was still offensive!

Lol “how dare they read me like this!”

Okay, that was enough. This was weird as fuck, and I was not going to let this hot cosplaying stranger sit there and accurately assess the sad state of my life. I was perfectly fine doing that myself. Alone. In private.

I’m an empyn, which means I absorb other people’s emotions.” Would I be able to get past Larkin and Seb if I made a run for it? “And look, sometimes you just get hungry for really specific emotions, you know?

I snorted, eating a spoonful of salted caramel, then looked over at him. “We should totally do it.” “Do what?” “Put the ice cream on our dicks.”

Omg do it!!!!

We’d told each other all those deep and embarrassing secrets because Holt said neither of us would remember in the morning. Except now, Axel the memory-wiper wasn’t coming. “Well.” Holt looked around his office, down at the ice cream, then back at me. “This is awkward.”

This is why you dont share all your secrets with strangers

“Have I fucked any of the wrestlers? No,” Holt had said while stirring rum into what remained of the salted caramel ice cream so he could drink it. “Have I imagined them all passing my naked and willing body around the ring to do whatever they want to me while a crowd of lusty spectators looked on? I’m not made of stone, Taylor. Of course I have.”

Lol

Cackling Granny had just turned into a lizard. Blood Suckapunch had turned into a bat. High Lord Crossbody could fly. Those two cops were demons. All the blood drained from my face as I slowly turned to look at Holt.

I may have been freaking out about the existence of monsters—flamboyant, wrestling monsters and old lady lizard monsters—but I still wanted to see the show. I wanted to see the Tasselled Tussler spinning his nipple tassels, damn it!

“Fuck, Taylor,” he panted desperately against my mouth between more messy kisses. “I want you to sit on my face and dip your balls into my mouth.”

Ummmm okay. Calm down sir.

Marcus had never done anything like this for me in the entire ten years we were together. I’d known Holt for less than a week and he’d already gone to the trouble of dressing up as a delivery guy to hand deliver my favourite flowers to me at work on a Monday morning.

Screaming and kicking my feet

“Good,” he said quietly, nuzzling my cheek. “Because I really, really like you too.”

Too cute

You know, if you wanted to bring a toothbrush and pyjamas, a sleepover at my place might be fun… My belly tightened with excitement as I stared down at my phone. Holt wanted me to spend the night with him?

Ahhhh a sleepover!!

“Didn’t you tell me you’ve always wanted to know what a footjob feels like?” he asked demurely,

Very demure. Very mindful.

His throat bobbed. “And the rest of me. All of me. All of me just… really, really likes you, Taylor.” I swallowed, my chest aching as I slid my palm along his forearm. “All of me really likes you too.”

I got a small triple chocolate shake called The Mud Cleansed from the Clothes of Those About to Meet their End, while Holt decided on a maple syrup and bacon shake with the name The Last Breakfast of a Man Marked for Death.

Fun

I was a little dazed. And then worry began creeping in. Maybe he’d just said it so Wes would let me in here. Maybe he hadn’t meant it.

Stop being dumb taylor. Yes he meant to call you his boyfriend.

He held up a pair of bell-bottom jeans and shot me a sultry smile.

Boots with the fur!

it was only once we were waiting in line behind the person currently paying that I noticed two things. One: the person paying was Marcus. Two: the person serving him was Cackling Lizard Granny.

Lizzard granny is fine. Stop being afraid of her. And ignore marcus

and lifted his chin, giving me a tight smile. “Well. Very unexpected bumping into you, but I should—” “Was it?” Lizard Granny suddenly piped up, filmy eyes gleaming with cunning. “Because you came in here right after them and spent a very long time lurking, almost as if you were looking for someone—”

Hell yeah Ethel

“If you’re Holt’s”—she tilted her head at him and gave me a loaded look—“and you’re in the know, then you just say the word, my dear. My girls can pay him a little visit if need be. We protect our own.”

Lizzard granny mafia strikes!

I’m pretty sure they just… knit or whatever. Talk about the old days. I dunno.” What were “the old days” for a bunch of giant lizards? Prehistoric times?

Lol

tunnelling inside me, grinding against my P-spot until I started to shake.

Out of everything going on in this book. I HATE the term "p-spot". Its come up a few gimes now and i dont like it!

“I’ve been getting an office ready for you,” he continued anxiously. “My neon guy is making a sign for it,

I don’t know why but the phrase "my neon guy" is making me laugh

huge neon sign between them. HotSex Corporation, it said in big, bold letters. “Delivery for HutSec,” the woman said cheerfully. “Just need you to sign.” “No,” Tim shouted

This chapter is pretty dumb.

I stopped by the door and looked back at the office. Every single person was staring at me in stunned silence. “Because I’ve always hated it here.” I shrugged. “I don’t even know what we do. And I don’t know what synergy means.”

He finally said it!

After a few intense seconds of silence, I tightened my stomach and let out a loud, almost perplexingly long fart that tapered off into a squeak.

And now we’ve gone back into the dumb shit.