He’s been rejecting my advances because he thinks it’s distracting me from processing my grief. That’s utter bullshit. Making love to him reaches a part of me that I can’t access on my own. It’s the most precious and frightening thing how much I need what we give to each other. It’s always felt transcendent. It’s not about getting off or escaping. It’s how I feel connected to him. And some days when I’m lost, adrift, being anchored to him is the only thing that makes it all bearable. I need him to understand.
I get it
