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It’s in my chest like a breathing, palpable thing. Not friendship. Something deeper. Eventually, I won’t be able to contain it, and I’m terrified that the moment that happens, I’ll lose Penny for good.
Penny meets my gaze. She smiles, and it knocks the fucking air from my lungs. She’s goddamn perfection. The only thing that would make it better would be if she was wearing my sweater. I want everyone in the whole arena—even her father—to know she’s mine.
I can only hope that one day she lets me have her. Not just in bed, and not just as friends. I want all of her, every bit—the ones I know and adore already, and the ones I don’t, but hope to one day. I’m earning her trust one little puzzle piece at a time, and while I don’t have the whole picture, I know that when I do, I’ll love it.
But most of all, I’m playing for my Lucky Penny.
“You’re calling me Callahan because it helps you pretend there’s nothing deeper going on here,” I say in a low voice. “Cut the shit, Penny. You know my name. Say it.”
“I don’t want distance.” I reach out, taking one of her hands in mine and squeezing. “I just want you. Not as friends. Not as the person you fuck. I want to be with you in all those ways and more.”
“I won’t lie to you; we’ve had a thing going.” I flush at the matter-of-fact note in his voice. That’s one way to put our arrangement. “And if you don’t like that, I don’t care if you demote me from captain or bench me.” He glances over at me, his gaze softening. “I just want a chance with her.”
“Who did this to you?”
My breath catches in my throat. I’ve never said these words before, but they’re truer than anything else in the world, and there’s no use holding back when Penny needs to know once and for all that for as long as she lets me, I’ll be hers. I can’t recall the moment I realized; it could have been a thousand different ones, brief moments coming together to create a constellation that’s imprinted on the fabric of my soul. Every time she smiles at me, I fall in love all over again. “Because I love you.”
“You need to tell him how you feel—otherwise he won’t trust you, and he’ll just keep getting hurt. Trust me, I know.”
“I’d choose you in every universe. I took my heart out of my chest and handed it over to you, raw and red, and it’s yours forever. You own it, and even if you try to give it back, if you abandon it, I won’t take it.”
And because she’s my good girl—my best girl, my fucking everything—that
