The Explosive Child: A New Approach for Understanding and Parenting Easily Frustrated, Chronically Inflexible Children

by Ross W. Greene

Plan B consists of three steps: the Empathy step, the Define the Problem step, and the Invitation step. The names of the steps aren’t anywhere nearly as important as their ingredients. 1. The Empathy step involves gathering information from your child to understand his concern or perspective about a given unsolved problem. 2. The Define the Problem step involves communicating your concern or perspective about the same problem. 3. The Invitation step is when you and your child discuss and agree on a solution that is realistic (that is, you and your child can actually do what you’re agreeing to do) and mutually satisfactory (it addresses the concerns that your child voiced in the Empathy step and that you articulated in the Define the Problem step).