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“I’m not going to lie to you, Deyanira. I’m going to choose you.” He turned back to look at me, a swell of emotion in his eyes I’d never seen before. “And I think I need to find a way to process that. I should choose the good of the world. I should be their hero. But I think when it comes down to it, I’d rather be yours,
because you have no one.”
“You really are a brutal little thing, Nightmare, but next time you hold back, I will find a way to coax that lethal demon from you and force her to come play with me.” “I can promise you that’s one side of me you never want to see.”
“I’m beginning to think there are no sides of you that wouldn’t absolutely destroy me.”
“I’m sorry everything is broken, Deyanira. But I want to fix it. I don’t think I’m supposed to want that. Hell, I don’t think I’m supposed to want you, but here we
are, and I can’t help the way my heart fucking aches for you.” He moved a hand into my hair, pulling me until we stood chest to chest. I had to tilt my head back just to peek into those eyes that wrecked me. And there, for just a moment, I wondered if I would ever look at him without hoping he would touch me.
“I am not enough. You are the stars and the storm, Wife. Somehow, you’re both peace and destruction. Nightmare and a daydream. You’re hell and home. Fear and solace. Slumber and panic. Kindness and rage. Light is easy to love, but I’ve seen your darkness, and I want that, too. I crave it. I want to fucking drown it in. But how does any
man live up to that? Deserve that?” I smiled. “I’ve heard it starts with stabbing, so I think we’re halfway there.”
He ripped his jacket off and wrapped it around my shoulders, gripping the lapel to yank me close. “You forget, Nightmare, you belong to me.” “I’m no one’s property,” I managed, though the words were a struggle beyond the way I’d needed him to touch me, to ease this ache within my body
that truly did belong to him. “We will discuss this at home.” “Looking forward to it.”
“Don’t tell lies, Orin. It’s not an attractive trait.” He smoothed a thumb over my bottom lip. “Maybe I don’t want you to be attracted to me. Maybe I’m the monster in disguise, and my anger is to protect you… from me.” “I don’t need to be protected from someone I am not afraid of.” His hand slid down until the heartbeat
in my neck throbbed against his palm. His fingers tightened. “Are you flirting or fighting with me right now, Deyanira?” “Neither. I’m simply standing here, willing to face your demons rather than back away and leave you alone with them. I know them as intimately as you do. There’s madness within the darkness you’re hiding, isn’t there?”
“No, Husband. I am the abyss that calls to your shadows, the tempest that matches your storm. We are not mere darkness, we are the symphony of our scars.”
“When you speak, I can hear the battle. When you glare, I can feel your repulsion. And I can’t breathe when you are near. I can’t think or see beyond my own rage. Whatever power you hold over me is a vicious form of torture.
And I am weak for you. Only you.” “This isn’t repulsion, nor weakness, Husband. This is fucking obsession. Every day. Every second. And maybe I’m a masochist because I don’t want to be without it.” “You don’t know what you’re asking for, Nightmare.”
My eyes dropped to his lips, th...
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thick as castle walls. “Y...
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“I’m so tired of fighting you. Of fighting myself. I know what I want. I’ve known for a long time, but I’ve been so angry, trying to convince myself that
you were the problem. But it’s always been me. That first night in your bedroom, there was a light in your eyes, unlike anything I’d ever seen. So much grit and defiance. But at the wedding, when you’d pieced together what I’d done, I watched that damn light fade, and it ripped everything I thought I knew about myself to shreds. Every day, I check to see if
it’s returned, if you’ve rediscovered the happiness you had before I stole it from you, and it never has. I’m sorry I broke you so tho...
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“This marriage is only getting started, Wife. I won’t see it end before I have a chance with you.”
“It’s important to you that we exhaust all our options. So that’s what we’ll do. If you told me you wanted to find a way to reach the moon, I’d be here for that, as well. Your desires are mine because you are mine, Wife. And then,
when all else fails, we’ll find something else to occupy our time.” Standing, I spun to wrap my arms around him. “What did you have in mind?” Something dark crossed his face as his dangerous gaze raked over my body. “Nothing decent. I can promise you that.” “Thank the gods. I hate decency.”
“The most I’ve ever gotten from a lover is flowers. And here you’ve got mass destruction.”
My sister was part of my first family, but you, my dear girl, are my second. The one I chose. Do this old man a favor and choose them back, though none of us deserve you.
“If there’s a single part of your heart that convinces you that I’d sit back and let you suffer for the rest of your life just to spare me the passing of mine, you don’t know the depth of my love for you.”
“Naughty Nightmare. There’s no rush.”
“Will you stay with me, my love? In the shadows?” “And in the light and every shade between,” I whispered.
“We still need to work on that nickname, though. Pretty sure you can’t just walk around calling Death Fluffy Bottom.” “Pretty sure I can.”
Ezra leaned over to growl in her ear until a blush colored her cheeks. I lifted the silver tray closest to me, devouring the bright fruit with my eyes before sliding my fork into the fattest strawberry. “You can have my sausage later, too, Paesha.”
My mouth dropped open, staring in silence at Orin as realization hit
me. Ezra was not just any soul. He was a god.
