Graves

by Katelyn Taylor

there is no way in fuck I’m getting into heaven. But right before my eyes, I swear to fuck it’s an angel.

If I don’t make it out of this, at least I got a glimpse of an angel before I burn in hell. If I do, then that angel is mine.

It’s a pain only I could ever understand, and the first night I saw it, I knew we were going to be bound to each other for all of eternity. Even if I had to drag her to hell with me.

She’s too precious for me to have laid eyes on her, but it’s too late for that.

“I told you that you’re mine. I meant it.”

“Your tears are so beautiful, baby. So beautiful when they’re just for me.”

“Baby, I would never let anything happen to you. If you didn’t want to be with me anymore, we would figure it out together. You’ll never be without a home again, I promise. Even more so, there is no possibility in this fathomable universe where you and I aren’t together until the end of time. You’re mine, Blake, and I’ll never let you go.”

He’s quickly becoming my favorite person. He knows me almost better than I know myself, and I think, in a way, I know him the same. It’s crazy and fast and insane, but there is no one that I feel like I trust more, especially in this moment, than him.

Yes, he saw her first, but he doesn’t know her, and she doesn’t know him. He doesn’t have an unbreakable bond that sets his soul on fire with a single look from her. I do, me and her. She’s mine, and I’ll do whatever it takes to protect her from everything, most of all him. And if it comes down to it, I’ll choose her every fucking time.

“If it was between you living or her, it would be her. Every. Time.”

I’m beginning to see she’s had to survive worse than me in her time, which is a chilling thought because I’m just about the worst there is.

If you die, I die.”

“I can’t. That’s what you are. You’re my angel, and I’ll be your devil. Bound for all eternity. I’ll do anything to protect you, always know that.”

The way I can barely form a sentence proves I’m in no position to be making decisions or declarations, but for some idiotic reason, I no longer feel threatened by him. He’s too obsessed with me, whether that’s good or not. I truly don’t think he’d ever hurt me or let anyone else hurt me.

I’d burn heaven itself to the ground to keep you as mine.

I’m nothing without her, and if she won’t have me, she won’t have anyone.

I’d rather fucking die than lose her.

He would rather die than ever hurt her, and I feel the same. He loves her more than he loves his next breath, and honestly, if it means keeping her happy forever, I don’t give a shit.

“I’ll love you until the end of time, angel. In this life, the next and every single one to come. It will always be you.”

I want the pain, though. I’ll take whatever pain she wants to throw at me with a fucking smile on my face.

“I’m so sorry you saw what you did. That you lived through literal hell with no one to be there and hold you through it.”

“I have you now, angel. Everything happened so that I could hold you in my arms. I don’t regret a thing.”

“Even in death, forever mine,”

“Forever ours,”

I can’t think of an easier promise I’ve ever made in my life. There isn’t anywhere or anyone I’d rather be with, ever. No matter what happens, I know that will never change.

“I love you, Zayden. More than I should, more than I knew I’d ever be capable of. I love you so much it physically hurts to be away from you.”

“That’s better. I love you, angel. More than my next breath, more than this entire planet. I’d happily sacrifice every man, woman, and child if it meant protecting you, keeping you.”

I want to tell them how much I love them. How I don’t want them to worry about me. How they made my shit life worth living, no matter how short our time was together. I want to tell them how I’m so thankful that they tried, how lucky I feel to have their love, but I don’t think I could physically say any of that, so instead, I settle for what I can.

I want to tell them I don’t want to leave, but I don’t have a choice. I’m out of time, though. Everything turns dark and my eyelids flicker before the breath in me is stolen and I fade away, loving them with my absolute dying breath.