One last question: If Lisa is serious about change, why not a good let-it-all-hang-out fight? Can’t Lisa let Rich know by the volume of her voice that she really means business? Nothing is wrong with fighting if it leaves Lisa feeling better and if it is part of a process by which Lisa gains a greater clarity that she will not proceed with things as usual. In ongoing battles of this sort, the single most important factor is not whether we fight or not, or whether our voice is raised or calm; it is the growing inner conviction that we can no longer continue to overfunction (in Lisa’s case, on
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No problem with fighting if used to underline the clarity of not continuing to overfunction
