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If I’m being objective, what Kaelis has accomplished as someone just shy of twenty-three years is impressive. But I can’t be objective when it comes to him. Not when his accomplishments are steeped in the suffering of others.
There are only two paths for an Arcanist in Oricalis: graduate the academy and be placed in the service of a noble clan, or be Marked with the brand and sent to a powder mill to work until a swift death. Magic is a rare commodity that requires even rarer resources to perform, making it highly controlled by the crown. Those who can wield it are never safe, and never free. Not really.
The future you thought you had is now behind you, as is your family and all you once thought you held dear before you joined our ranks. To truly become one of us, you must sacrifice all you once were.”
The World is real, Mother’s voice echoes from my childhood, and it can do anything. Which is why it must never be found. Do not trust anyone who would seek it.
“But they abandon you.” The words are searing hot needles pressing between my ribs and into the most delicate parts of my heart. The deepest fear I never want anyone to see…least of all him.
Rage is worth little if it’s not channeled. I told Arina that many times, just as Mother said it to me. I must listen to her advice now more than ever.
We have work to do, you and I. But I will not have you suffering further through it.”
“How many wounds do you have that you just let bleed, Clara?” His words are little more than a whisper. The pad of his thumb grazes against my lower lip. I fight a quiver and lose. “How many wounds do you have?” Turning the question back to him is a weak retort and I know it. As weak as my knees feel. “Enough that I’ll remake the whole world to fix them.” His voice is deep. I didn’t expect him to answer.
“I might be a recent noble. I might deeply appreciate your kind assistance in trying to guide me.” I let my tone do the work of conveying everything I’m not saying overtly. “But don’t forget that because I am ‘new,’ I didn’t grow up with the same privileges as you. I grew up in a world where if you threaten someone, it has consequences. So be really sure you want to make me your enemy before you say another word. I know where you sleep, after all.”
“Fine. I don’t care how you look. Be a bloody mess. Be the rat queen of Eclipse City that you so want to be. But I will not ever have it be said I don’t care for those closest to me.”
“Well, don’t worry, I’ll earn one of the two spots in Swords,” I say hastily. Emilia proved it was possible with her words and actions today. “That’s one of the most difficult houses to get into.” “Doubting me is unappealing,” I say.
Love me, hate me, but only look at me like my existence sets you on fire…
“Every time I see you, I see what the world could be.”
“Then set me free.” “What?” “You consume my every waking moment. Devour my thoughts. You’ve poisoned my halls with your scent. Flooded my dreams to the point that I cannot tell if it is a delight or a nightmare to want to drown in you. If you hate me, then hate me, let us be eternal rivals. Let any future where you and I are more than enemies finally be done and gone.
