Unsteady

by Peyton Corinne

her eclectic music taste that swings from Steely Dan to Ethel Cain to Harry Styles in the same hour.

she just like me fr

“Sadie’s Songs for Reece’s Sad Demon Brain,” I read aloud, before adding, “You spelled Rhys wrong.” “Your parents spelled your name wrong on the birth certificate.

“It might not work, and I don’t really know what’s bothering you, but music helps me.” She stops there, but the unspoken words are just as loud. The look in her eyes says I wanted to help, and this is all I have and I see you.

I love breakfast food.” “I thought you liked savory over sweet.” “I like anything when it comes to you,”

I think I like what the aftermath of Sadie Gray looks like on me.

A hand grabs my wrist hard, little fingernails pressing into my skin, and I almost moan; I’d know the feel of Sadie’s skin even if I were blind.

Not to mention, the man eats my pussy like it’s his fucking job.

I’m going to come too fast. That, or tell her I love her or something worse.

The push and pull for control—God, I want her forever.

She takes a big gulp of her Big Gulp.

“If you’d picked up a basketball all those years ago, I’d be courtside for the rest of my life with one of those big foam fingers. If you take up a paintbrush, I’ll buy every piece that we have wall space for. If you use that big brain of yours for engineering or law, I’ll do whatever I can to show I support you until my last breath.”

No bc I'm getting teary eyed

“Sadie, if you told me you were joining the Witness Protection Program, I’d ask, ‘Where are we going?’ and ‘Can I pull off a beard?’ ”

I just felt numb. Like there was this dark shadow where everything good was and I couldn’t reach it anymore.”

now wait a second.......

She may ask me to go one day, but I will never be the one to leave. Not her, or your brother, or you. Tell me you understand that.”

:(

“Gray,” I choke out, wishing desperately I could hold her. Hell, my arms rise, like I might try, but she flinches. I think it would hurt less if she hit me.

Another reason I’m planning to never let these kids out of my sight again. I’d marry Sadie tomorrow if it meant it got them out of this damn house.

Who am I kidding? I’d marry Sadie tomorrow. Period. No stipulations.

“And nothing—no dark part of you, or your life—will ever change that. So, like I told Oliver, if you don’t want me anymore, that’s something I’ll have to deal with. But there will never be a day that I do not want you.”

I think I’d do anything he wanted right now.

Oliver waits a bit before getting half out of the car. He turns back to me, because he’s on my side of the car, and nods. “Love you.” My heart clenches because I know how rare those words are from him, even to his own family.

STOPPPPP ITTTTT

“I’m so proud of you,” I whisper. “I know it takes a lot for you to ask for help. But I’m so proud.”