Unsteady

by Peyton Corinne

“Don’t ever grab me like that again.” She bends my wrist a little more, and I want to ask her to keep it there in her warm grip because this is the first anything, other than pain, I’ve felt in months.

Desperate, I spread my legs until my sweatpants are pressed lightly against her legging-covered flesh.

“All right, hotshot, let’s make a deal.” No deal needed—if she keeps looking at me like this, I’ll do anything she says.

Are you safe? Are you okay? Still, I shake my head. Crumbs. I’ll eat every last one.

“It’s not,” I cut her off vehemently. “You made me a playlist.”

She stops there, but the unspoken words are just as loud. The look in her eyes says I wanted to help, and this is all I have and I see you.

Somehow, Sadie got to the rink before me, which makes me rush to get on the ice like an overeager kid for his first real game.

A wave of frustration rolls through me, as if I have some automatic claim on her, like a fucking third grader. I licked her so she’s mine.

“Tonight was—” I groan, my hands covering my face as I beg, “Please don’t say good, I don’t think I can handle that again.”

Just the thought of her settles me immediately, the image burned into my mind of her hovering over me in the locker room like a queen atop a throne. Does she know I’d kneel for her forever if it meant she’d look at me like that?

“This is my fucking team. Show some respect.”

I go down on her often, my favorite position being her on her back on the bed, her legs over my shoulders while I kneel and jack myself off.

“That’s nice,” Liam mumbles quietly. “What is, bud?” He tucks his head into my neck. “That you have a mommy. And a nice one.” I have to close my eyes for a second. Fuck fuck fuck.

I kiss the bridge of her nose, slowly sliding in another inch. “Don’t be ridiculous, kotyonok. You can take it.”