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He was adrift in their world, unsure of his significance, and to open himself to a point where conversation could take place would only have revealed how unlike them he was.
"We're trying to hide inside each other. We called it love to pretend we were normal but it didn't change anything."
As long as she was there and alive he could invest her with whatever qualities he wanted. By sheer effort of will he could make himself see her as he needed her to be.