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Started reading
December 10, 2019
It takes a man at least three weeks to realize you’re not actively seeking him out. After four weeks, he’s wondering, “What the hell you’re doing.” After five to six weeks, chances are he’ll be acting like a high school girl wondering where the hell you are, and what the hell you’re doing if he cared about you at all. If he hasn’t contacted you within eight weeks, he’s moved on, and you should do the same. Don’t give him another thought. Don’t let him consume your mind. Move on and be marvelous.
This means if he tells you he needs time to think about what he wants, or worse when he just falls off the face of the earth without providing an explanation you need to cut him off and withdraw. To take you seriously he must put you in a different category than he does the other women in his rotation. For him to view you differently, he must know without a doubt you’ll kick his ass to the curb at the first sign of disrespect.
For example, if a man tells you he needs time to sort out his feelings, turn the tables on him so to speak. Tell him you agree and nicely say, “I haven’t been too happy either, I’ll use this time to figure out what I need to be happy.” When he comes looking for you (and they always do) let it be a few weeks before he can find you. This approach tells him while he’s trying to figure out what he needs, you’re doing some discovering on your own.
Your only job is to show him you can live without him. Show him you do not need him, and you might be surprised how fast he comes looking for you. Most importantly -- make your exit with class, dignity, and pride intact.
simple.
For a man to want you, he has to miss you. He cannot possibly experience what life is like without you if he sees your beautiful face in a post or tweet every single day. Nor will he feel the need to call if all he has to do is log on to the nearest computer to find out what you’re doing, how you’re feeling and where you’re going. You’re taking away any incentive he has to actually pick up the phone and find out what is going on in your world.
And remember, in the grand overall scheme of things, a breakup is just a breakup. It’s the end of one chapter of your life before another more exciting chapter begins.
Adopt the mindset that a breakup is not a breakdown.
You have no choice but to move on and be even more amazing than before.
Don’t contact a man to begin with. Why? Because contacting him is a form of pursuing and chasing him. It’s alpha male behavior. Remember men run from anyone who appears to be trailing them.
We have known since the beginning of time men like to be hunters. Let him hunt you. And learn to enjoy being hunted.
Calling Mr. Ex sends the message you are clingy, desperate and trying too hard. For a man to want anything, he must believe he thought of it first.
“If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind.
Have a sense of pride and self-respect. Know if he’s not dialing your number, he’s not worthy of your time.
Women tend to want instant satisfaction and taking two months of your life to accomplish something you want long term may seem drastic. Remember it’s not about an immediate fix. It’s about creating a long-term relationship, taking the time to gain insight and the clarity you need to fix a broken relationship or move past a bad one.
It’s only natural for you to want the one person who hurt you to hold you in their arms and give you the reassurance you need that all will be okay. More importantly, you want him to stop this foolish behavior and just fix the
damn breakup. It is unfortunate breakups don’t work like that, but you must maintain a clear understanding that if a man isn’t contributing his fair share to make a relationship work, then you need to make him feel like your mind has changed and drop out of sight.
Realistically, if the two of you shared a deep connection, Mr. Ex will have contacted you within thirty days. If Mr. Ex makes no contact within sixty days, it’s very safe to assume your relationship is over. By the end of this time frame, if you have focused on your life, you may not even notice. You haven’t been wallowing around in self-pity, you’ve been busy making your life a remarkable one. In the end, whether he reaches out to you or not, if you have made a clean break and haven’t lost your self-respect in the process, you still come out on top.
Men love a woman who is a little elusive and hard to figure out. Why? Because it intrigues him and leaves him craving more. After a breakup, becoming a mystery can be attractive and a challenge. If you’ve played by the rules and not called or text, Mr. Ex will eventually call because ‘curiosity kills the cat.’ He’ll eventually want to know what’s going on in your life and more importantly, why you’re not calling. When he does call let it go directly to voicemail, after the third or fourth attempt he makes, responds to one. If by phone be polite but don’t offer too much information and
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Know your value and understand the qualities you bring to a relationship.
“A man is like a cat; chase him, and he will run. Sit still and ignore him, and he’ll come purring at your feet.”
By giving Mr. Ex space, and more importantly silence you transfer the feelings of loss, rejection, and abandonment that he placed on you, right back to him. Often men fail to realize what they have until it is gone and it’s your job to make him understand what he’s lost.
The more he is unable to read your emotions the harder he will try and the more he will want you.
Each passing day the urge to touch base with him will become less of a chore and more of an accomplishment. Carry on with your life as you did before meeting him and prove to him (and yourself) that you’re independent and perfectly capable of having a life of your own.
It takes four to eight weeks for a man to really experience the absence of your presence and realize he may lose you for good.
Have faith in yourself that you’re worth the effort. When you keep him guessing, it keeps him interested. Men want to win at all costs, so if he values you enough, the strong alpha male will hang in there for the long haul and will be thrilled when you do respond. If a man gives up on love that easily
then he wasn’t worth your time, to begin with.
A man’s purpose is to pursue you, protect you and at his core he wants to make you happy.
Chasing a man may work out for a little while, but the happiest women understand confidence comes from knowing he wants you. Therefore the pursuit is crucial. It proves his worthiness and ultimately separates the boys from the men. You gain confidence knowing he’s right where he wants to be. A man just doesn’t appreciate a woman who is too easy to get. He may keep an easy catch around for a little while, but he’ll never slip a ring on her finger.
Do not make the mistake of giving him the impression he’s on your mind. It’s safe to say if you are talking about him or doing for him, you are thinking of him. Men don’t like to speak about their feelings or emotions, which is exactly what you’re trying to get him to do. Stop immediately and go inaudible, until he goes out of his way doing things to make you happy and content.
At the end of the day ask yourself if you want a man who gives you no indication he is interested, available, reliable, stable, responsible or who can be a good provider? All of which are the key, fundamental elements of a successful long-term relationship.
