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I’m not used to being seen.
The all-too-familiar feeling of embarrassment over being “too much” flares.
“When did you start making your feelings smaller for other people’s benefit?”
I miss a life I never got to live—the one with the found family and friends I didn’t get the chance to find. I grieve for it.
“I’ve had a lot of people come and go in my life—most of those I was supposed to trust failed me.” His eyes close and hold a moment before he opens them. “I’d be an idiot to let myself get hurt. So I make judgments. I put people into boxes. I let my anger get the best of me and push them away. But you keep showing up. You seem to understand.”
“You never have to do that with me. Show me the messy parts, okay? God knows, I’ve shown you mine.” He winces. I look down at our hands, intertwined and resting between us. Have I ever fit anywhere quite so easily?
No one is owed your history, but there is trust in telling,
“Do you ever have an aching sense of dread when you feel this happy?”
“It’s really fucking scary, Chloe.” I exhale, then lick my lips. “It is.” “It’s like…I can’t imagine my life without you, so I don’t want to. But then it’s worse to not think about it, because then it’s like I won’t be prepared to rebuild.” “You don’t need to be prepared.” I rub his chest, and he places his hand on top of mine. “I’d fight for this, dove…. You know that, right?”
“You’re the most resilient, dedicated, and beautiful person I know. To know you is to love you, and I consider myself privileged to know you.”
Nothing is as important as this kiss, this moment. Warren has always been good at that, creating a moment where nothing else seems to exist or matter. Where time pauses. Where loneliness disappears. Filling me, body and soul, with total, familiar, and sensational peace.
