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Mia has this way sometimes of just pulling things out of me without even trying. Her presence alone makes me want to just open up and I always feel better just being near her.
“I have five here, Mi. I think we can call it.”
“How? How the hell are you so damn good at this? Is your tongue a machine? That’s the only logical explanation at this point.”
“In fact, it is and I know how to use it.”
Going in space or deep into the abyss of the ocean are two places you’ll never catch me.
My best friend is the goddamn sunshine in my life when everything around me is dark and gray.
She nestles her body closer to mine and I nod my head against her, wrapping my arms around her. Holding Mia like this feels… right. Like she’s just supposed to be right here, right now, and maybe always.
Because for the first time in years, I really want to fucking kiss her.
Being alone makes everything heavier, harder. And when I’m with Mia, when I’m talking to her, I just feel like she slowly chips away all of the broken pieces.
Nate grins down at me and I swear, a genuine smile from Nate Campbell is one of the most beautiful sights.
I’ve seen a lot of beautiful things in my life—different places, spectacular views. But nothing beats the way Mia looks today, and I almost just kissed her because of it.
“I remember telling you that, aside from my family, no girl had ever worn my jersey. Then you showed up to the game wearing it, and it made me happy. So I snapped the picture when we were back at your dorm. You’ve worn my name and number on your back ever since.”
“I can’t believe you remember that.”
“Don’t look so surprised, Smalls. Everything with you is a core memory.”
Looking back, I can’t believe I ever agreed to just be her friend when I was so obviously crazy about her from the start.
Feeling her body next to mine is a comfort and a peace that I’ve desperately needed for so long.
We don’t feel like just best friends tonight. We haven’t for a few weeks, if I’m going to be honest. We feel like more and I’m not sure what to think of it.
Mia, please fucking tell me you want this. Tell me you want me to fucking ruin you because it’s all I can think about.
“I’ve waited for you, Mia. God, I’ve wanted you so much longer than I ever let myself admit.”
“I want you,”
And every wall I had up, every reason or excuse why this wouldn’t work, every single thing I tried to convince myself of comes crumbling down.
I’m leading with my heart for once in my damn life. I’m choosing my happiness. I’m choosing Nate.
I kissed my best friend. And I liked it. And I want to keep doing it.
“Your love language is definitely physical touch,” I say as his hands run down my back, cupping my ass. “You are my love language.”
“I guess because to me, even really ordinary moments with you are a dream, Smalls. I still can’t believe I get to be with you.”
“Tell me what you want,”
“Ruin me,”
“It’ll only ever be you.”
“I didn’t want the world to see who I’d become. But I’ve never had to pretend around you. There are so many parts of me that I was ashamed of, so many cracks within the man I was. But you filled those cracks. Every single one, Mia. You filled them with understanding, with laughter and compassion, with love. All of it was slowly killing me, I was breaking down, I could feel it. But as always, my best friend was the anchor that held me in place. You kept me from falling too far off course.”
“Eres mi sol, mi luna y todas mis estrellas.” You are my sun, my moon and all my stars. “I love you. I’ve loved you since before I really even knew what that word meant. I just knew it was you. It was always supposed to be you.”
“Being with you used to scare me, Nate. I used to think that being anything more than your best friend meant losing that part of you, of us. But one thing I’ve learned is that just because you’re scared of the risk doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take it. And if you love someone, you tell them. Even if it scares the hell out of you, you say it. Because if you don’t, you’ll never know if you just missed out on the best part of your life. And I love you, Nate. In a really big and stupid way that makes me pretend to care about your golf obsession, and give you the last pink Starburst, in a hopelessly
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“Seeing you in that today, knowing that you’re really mine, makes the sight so much sweeter.”
“Well, I’ve always been your biggest fan.”
“Yeah, but now I get to give you orgasms, so I’m really winning.”
She’s my eternal sunshine and I’m so glad that we found our way out of the friend zone, because this right here is exactly what I want. My purpose. My future. The place I’m constantly running towards is her. My end zone is Mia.
