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The last time she was slumped and unresponsive by a car was when I tethered her to me and bound her to my side forever. I told her she had no choice, but that was far from the truth.
If everything spills over, I’ll find a way to trap her in again. Even if I have to buy every fucking desert and shove the sand back inside.
“You yelled at me. I didn’t like it.” “Won’t happen again.” “Thanks. I had fun with Aunt Elsa today and the dinner with Uncle Aiden went well.” “Good.” “She sent you food.” “I see.” “It’s actually for me, but I’ll share.”
“You won’t object?” “About?” “Me calling him Leo.” “Do you want me to object?” “Nope.” She smiles and kisses my cheek. “You can be so adorable when you’re compliant, babe.” And then she slides into the back seat. I remain rooted in place, resisting the urge to touch where her lips burned my skin. Did she just call me adorable and babe in the same sentence after kissing my cheek?
Ava has always been an open book, including her attention-seeking behavior and over-the-top hatred during the past couple of years. I recognized what she wanted to accomplish with those and I often smashed any opportunity where she could’ve moved on to smithereens.
“I think you don’t want me to know about an accident that I believe could have traumatic effects that could interfere with my state.”
“I’m not an idiot, Eli, and I also have enough self-awareness to know you must’ve seen the version of me that’s riddled with so many issues, it shouldn’t be allowed outside, and yet you neither threw me back at my parents nor locked me up in a psychiatric facility. You never treated me as abnormal, and I’m grateful. No, I’m beyond grateful. I owe you and, therefore, I trust you in this regard.”
I don’t like to offer excuses. I’m your father, Eli. You can use excuses with me. I don’t like it and I don’t want to be reinstated in the project because of my wife. Well, you are and you should learn how to be grateful.
“You’ll have to share my bed, too. I’m not your whore, Eli. I’m your wife and you’ll treat me as such.”
“What’s the reason for this sudden change? I thought you agreed that we didn’t need intimacy.” “I changed my mind. So either you give me what I want, or I’ll find someone who does. Think about it, okay?”
“If it doesn’t, you might want to start thinking about whether or not those compromises are your hard limits. If they are, you might also want to think about the usability of this marriage and if the convenience outweighs the heartache.”
“My wife asked you to leave. Either you do that with your face intact or you do it with your teeth falling out. Whether or not I break those hands you touched her with is subject to whether you remove your repugnant presence in the next ten seconds.”
“Isn’t the entire purpose of this party to get my attention and piss me off? Both have been accomplished exceptionally well.”
“What do you want—” “My wife.”
“I want to see you. Properly.” “And I want to sink my fucking teeth in your throat and mess up that skin with blood.” “Deal,” I breathe out, my voice a fallen whisper in the silence. “Jesus fucking Christ. I tell you I want to draw your blood and you just to agree to it? Have you lost your damn mind?” “No. I trust you won’t hurt me and I know if I ask you to stop, you will. It’s a reasonable price for seeing you naked.” I sit up so I’m cradling his thighs and undo the second button of his shirt with trembling fingers. “I don’t like it when I’m the only one stripping. I know you do it for
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“You want me to lose control, Mrs. King? Want me to fuck you like a madman and stretch that tight cunt of yours to fit me? Want me to own you while I punish you?”
“You’re a fucking nightmare,” he grunts against my throat. “You’re ruining everything.” “Good.” I whimper against his mouth. “You ruined everything for me, too. I wish we could do a heart switch so you can feel what I do.” “Fuck, Ava.”
“What’s yours is mine. What’s mine is also mine.” “By God. You’re such a brat.”
It was bad when he was a cold, emotionless monster, but now, it’s impossible to deny how much I’m irrevocably in love with this man.
“I’m here to stay, Uncle. So either you accept that and the beautiful grandchildren we’ll give you, or you drive yourself to an early grave by giving yourself heart issues.” “Grandchildren, Cole.” Uncle Aiden grins wolfishly. “For your information, we’ll be sharing those.” “Many of them, too,” Eli says, caressing my waist. “My Ava wants at least three.”
“Should we go to a West End show later?” “You don’t even like the theater.” “But you do.” And to cheer me up, he’s willing to watch things he doesn’t like. This isn’t fair. I want the cold Eli back. “We probably can’t get good tickets this late.” “I can get any tickets you want. Up to and including a meet and greet with the actors backstage for hugs and pictures. Scratch that. Only pictures. No hugs.”
I’m losing her. Again. She’s slipping between my fingers. Again. Her presence is diminishing. Fucking again. And yet I’m grabbing onto scraps of her consciousness, moments of her presence, and fighting the reality of her pending fall.
“Name two happy memories.” “When Dad sat me down and told me I was born different and I have no reason to feel ashamed of it. In fact, I should be as proud of it as he is of me.”
“What’s your second happy memory?” “The day we got married.”
“Breathtaking indeed,” I say, my eyes focused on the soft slopes of her face. The charm radiating from her stabs my armor and slashes a crack that’s much more fatal than the previous ones.
It has become bolder with each of her soft smiles and the growth of her gullible fucking trust. It’s been shaking my foundation every time she’s held on to me for support, every time she’s looked at me with those huge eyes that hold the vain hopes of a naive woman. Maybe she needs to learn the hard way that she shouldn’t trust me. Not when I don’t trust me.
“Want to know why it was scary, Mrs. King? Because you acted like prey in front of a predator. If you don’t wish to be devoured, don’t run away.”
Broken beauty has always been the most haunting. The most enticing, too.
“Lending you a hand—or, more accurately, a mouth.” She winks up at me and moistens her lips. “I’ve been told I’m brilliant at giving blowjobs.”
Jesus fucking Christ.
“You’re such a brat outside the bedroom, but inside, you’re good at following instructions, Mrs. King. Open wider, show me how much you want me to use your mouth.”
She’s the exception to my rules. The discrepancy in my perfectly written novel. The mutation to my biology. It started with a sense of challenge at uni, then it morphed into a bizarre obsession every time she pissed me off—and she did that a lot.
Then it suddenly became a violent possession. A need for ownership. The moment I identified the bug, it was already too late to extract her from my life. Ava is the most dangerous person I’ve ever come across. She can break me even while she’s broken herself. She can worm herself between my armor and my skin.
As she looks at me while I fuck her mouth, I realize with depressing clarity that she’s already seeped beneath my skin and she’s...
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“Should I fuck you here, beautiful?” “If you want. Anything you want.” “Jesus fucking Christ. How come all your attitude disappears when my cock talks to your cunt?” I slap her arse. “Maybe it should talk to this hole as well.”
She can be so affectionate after sex and often showers me with hugs and kisses as if she can’t get enough. My wife is definitely the type who loves to ‘cuddle’ after I fuck her brains out, and although I never cared for the act before, I do with her.
“How does it feel, beautiful?” “Good. You feel so good.”
“God, you really feel so good, Eli,” she breathes out in a needy voice. “Fuck me. I love it when you fuck me.” “Like this?” I
An organ she poked, provoked, and breathed life into, now it seems to only beat in her presence. Her words fill the bathroom thicker than the steam. “Let’s have a baby.”
I began to notice her vicious pink aura when she made it her mission to drive away all of the women I fucked after she enrolled in uni.
From now on, no one else but me will touch her. Fuck her. Own her.
“You’ll be destructive without a purpose.” “I have a purpose. It’s her.”
memory. Ava has become an integral part of my life I cannot survive without and that makes her a weakness, a liability, a loose thread anyone could exploit and use against me. All this time, I’ve been battling with the notion of cutting that thread and ridding myself of the hazard she poses, but every time, I come to the conclusion that I refuse to imagine my life without her sunshine, pink-themed existence in it.
“I find no pleasure in your pain, Ava.”
I’ll have the girl whose life became so intertwined with mine, I can’t imagine myself without her.
She looks like my own fucking angel. Broken wings and all.
I can’t trust myself to live without my wife anymore. She kept some of my darkness at bay by giving me purpose—her. Now that she’s gone, I don’t trust myself not to fuck everything up in a show of epic proportions.
Since she waited years for me to come around. I can do the same. For as long as it takes.
“I was wondering why someone like Eli would hand over the divorce papers so easily, and now, I understand. He’s willing to sacrifice his only red line for your safety.”
I recognized my life wouldn’t be peaceful the moment this motherfucking twat walked up to my eldest daughter the day she was born and kissed her on the mouth.
