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To the women who dust themselves off and try over and over again.. You are stronger than you think you are. You’re the bad ass!
“Can you focus on the road, please?” Autumn says from the back; she’s literally saying what we are all thinking. “Can you focus on the road?” Waylon mimics her as he picks up speed even faster. “Pain in my ass,” he says and then turns his head around to talk to Autumn. “You’re a pain in my ass. You focus on the fucking road!” he yells at the same time Everleigh shouts something, but I’m looking at Waylon—who is looking in the back—and by the time I look forward again, the bright headlights are shining straight into the truck.
“Oh my God,” I say, smiling. “Where is she?” I’m ready to go to her. “Charlie,” he says again, and his tone is flat. “I’m so sorry.” It’s then I know my life will never be the same. It’s then I know the pain I feel will stay with me forever. It’s then I know all of my dreams are being shattered. He says two words, and then the blackness gets me. “She’s gone.”
There is no mistake; Charlie Barnes holds me accountable for what happened that night. Little does he know, he’s not the only one. “Hello, Charlie.”
Selfish, that is what she is, and I hate every single bone in her body.
“What do you want from me, Charlie?” I ask him softly. “I literally can’t give you anything else, because I don’t have anything left to give.” I wipe away a tear. “You can turn back around and go back where you came from.”
I can see the fear written all over her face, and I’m expecting the worst answer. I’m not expecting the answer to knock me right to my core. “Wouldn’t be the first time a man put his hands on me.”
“But just so you know, I died that night also. I’m breathing, but inside I’m dead. There is nothing left for you to destroy.”
“To be honest, I don’t think she’s my friend. At least she shouldn’t be my friend, but I’m going to make her be my friend again.” I chuckle. “That is if she doesn’t leave before then.” The thought of her leaving town makes me grip the reins in my hands tighter. “You’ll like her, she’s pretty, like you. You have the same hair color.” I pet her neck. “She hates me, but you… she’ll love you, and that’s going to be enough for me. If I can get her to smile at you, I’ll take her hating me.” The tear escapes the side of my eye. “I’m going to try,” I vow out loud, “I’m going to try.”
“Your home is right here,” he repeats, “right fucking here.” “Once upon a time, I thought it was.” I pick my hand up and wipe away the tear. “I’m not so sure anymore.” “I am,” he declares, his shoulders back. “I’m not sure of a lot of things these days.” His voice comes out shaky. My body gets tight waiting for the rest of his statement, except it’s nothing that I thought it would be. The words that come out of his mouth send me jumping off a cliff, but this time, there is water there to catch me falling and not just an empty black hole. “But I do know that this is where you belong.”
I push the hair away from her face. “Tell me what you want?” I ask. “You are the one in charge.” “I want you to touch me. I want to touch you.” Her voice is unsure and shaky. “Then touch me, baby,” I urge. Her eyes drop to my lips as they part, and her hands, even though they have been on me more than once, touch my chest as if for the first time.
“Oh, I’ll look after her, all right,” I assure her, my eyes on Autumn as she turns her eyes to me. It’s right then and there that I decide the only man who is going to fucking date her is me.
Five days later, in the middle of his backyard, with all our family and friends, wearing a wedding dress I didn’t even think would be possible to get on such short notice, my father walks me down the aisle to the man who made me see that I am worthy. Who showed me what unconditional love is. Who showed me what real love feels like. I became Mrs. Charlie Barnes.
