Caution to the Wind (The Fallen Men, #7)

by Giana Darling

“The dragon teaches you that if you want to climb high you have to do it against the wind.” – Chinese proverb

But I remembered him. I always remembered him. He seemed like some kind of heathen god, big enough to kill a man with his bare hands, so broad through the shoulders it seemed like he could carry the weight of the world.

Rocky because I was scrappy and loyal. He said people were prone to underestimate me due to my slight and dainty build, but they’d inevitably find out some day that I was a champion. Glory because Cleo’s full name was Cleopatra, which meant “glory of the father,” and Cleo was his pride and joy.

“Your name means elegant pearl, doesn’t it? Like the pearl seen beneath the Chinese dragon’s chin or clutched in its talon.”

“Mong zi sing lung,” I murmured to her. “Parents hope their children will become a dragon among men. That we’ll be special.”

I didn’t like them, but then, I didn’t like many people.

“The marriage line is too long,” she added. “Your reputation or theirs will be affected by this union. You are not very lucky, daughter. Not in love.”

“Because there is strength in softness too. There is purity, success, and happiness in finding balance between yin and yang. If you don’t learn this, the tragedies of your life will overtake you.”

“In real life, Dr. Axelsen, white knights rarely get happy endings. Only broken hearts.”

Katherine Kay was admitted to the hospital six more times over the next eighteen months, and that last time required surgery for the removal of her ruptured uterus, a surgery that made her sterile at the age of twenty-five. The day after she was discharged, I made her my wife.

Looking back, that was the start of it for me. Falling in love with him. Ruining his life. They would become one and the same, but right then, it was pure and simple. I loved him the way a child loved a superhero.

“It’s strange,”

“That you could look at me and see everything I’ve ever wanted to be.”

“It feels just as good as it does bad. To be seen like that.”

“Like being flaye...

“One hundred hearts would not be enough to carry the love I have for you,” I croaked out in Cantonese. Ma smiled. “One hundred hearts would never be enough to carry the love and pride I have for you, my Mei Zhen. Remember that always.”

It was harder to become a criminal than you’d think. Trust me, I put some effort into it.

I wanted a man to tremble as he held back his strength to touch me like I was made of glass, not because he thought I was weak, but because he thought I was precious. I wanted a man to change his career because it would have meant too much time away from me even though I’d never ask him to do so. I wanted a man who’d join a criminal motorcycle gang just to find justice for my murder. I wanted a man who would always try to save me, even when I tried to sabotage myself. I wanted what Cleo had, but not how she had it. I wanted Henning. Not as a father figure. But as a man. My man.

My God, I was in love with Henning Axelsen.

Why didn’t women talk about men like that? It wasn’t only feminine to be so beautiful. It spoke of his goodness, the generosity of his heart, and the power of his kind, keen gaze. It spoke of a man who was confident enough in himself to be soft when needed and strong enough to take on the whole world if someone he loved was at risk. God, he was beautiful.

As quickly as I realized I would love him forever, I realized I would never have him.

He frowned, moving away from Cleo immediately, trying to come for me because he knew, in one look, in one moment, I was hurting.

No, I wanted to shout, I’m in love with you, and it feels like a prison sentence confined to solitary because you’ll never love me, too.

“It would be a fuckin’ crime not to have at least one dance with you in that red dress.”

“Bein’ loyal doesn’t mean takin’ on the world to right your loved one’s wrongs, Mei. You understand that, right?”

Whatever the reason, I found the courage to throw caution to the wind, rise up on my toes again, and kiss him.

“I’d pay any price for you,” he whispered fiercely, his blood-soaked hands clutching at my face so hard it almost hurt. “Is that enough love for you, Rocky?”

Now, I had twenty-two tattoos all over my body, each of which had originally been drawn by Henning’s hand.

“Fuck, you’re the most dangerous thing I’ve ever known,”

“For her sake, then, you should put a stop to the games you’re playin’,” Wrath murmured. “’Cause I might’a been wrong ’bout the look on your face, but anyone with eyes can see she lives for you, and she’d die for you in a second.”

“Ransom, Pigeon,” I called out as I stumbled after Kasper. “Tell Axe-Man––” I had to swallow a hopeless sob as it rose into my mouth. “Tell Axe-Man I love him, and I hope he forgives me for leaving him again. But I’m not sorry for doing it. He told me once he’d pay any price for me. It’s my turn to pay the price for him.”

“I’m sayin’ my soul recognized yours a long fuckin’ time ago, and no matter the time between us and the mistakes we’ve made, I wouldn’t change a fuckin’ thing ’cause it meant we could be here today about to be husband and wife.”

Then my daughter pronounced us legally bound and I kissed Mei Zhen Axelsen for the millionth time, but for the first time as my wife, and all I knew was peace.