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“You are being unbearable, with a U,” Violet cried.
Oftentimes, when people are miserable, they will want to make other people miserable, too. But it never helps.
Tears are curious things, for like earthquakes or puppet shows they can occur at any time, without any warning and without any good reason.
Yes, there are some questions that are so simple that anyone can answer them,
“Welcome to the Anxious Clown restaurant—where everybody has a good time, whether they like it or not.
“I’ll have a cup of coffee with nondairy creamer,” Mr. Poe said.
ahead of his time
If you are allergic to a thing, it is best not to put that thing in your mouth, particularly if the thing is cats.
They were so relieved that something had finally gone right that they laughed as if they were at the circus instead of in the middle of a lake, in the middle of a hurricane, in the middle of trouble.
“That means,” Klaus said, “that before long certain people will come to look at it. And some of those people”—he paused here dramatically—“will be realtors.”
Frustration is an interesting emotional state, because it tends to bring out the worst in whoever is frustrated. Frustrated babies tend to throw food and make a mess. Frustrated citizens tend to execute kings and queens and make a democracy.
And frustrated moths tend to bang up against lightbulbs and make light fixtures all dusty.
“It’s miraculous!” Klaus cried, as the flame took hold. “It’s unbelievable!” Aunt Josephine cried. “Fonti!” Sunny shrieked. “It’s the scientific principles of the convergence and refraction of light!”
If you don’t care about something, one way to demonstrate your feelings is to say the word and then repeat the word with the letters S-C-H-M replacing the real first letters. Somebody who didn’t care about dentists, for instance, could say “Dentists, schmentists.”
she was so afraid of everything that she made it impossible to really enjoy
The Gordian Knot was a fancy knot tied in a piece of rope by a king named Gordius. Gordius said that if Alexander could untie it, he could rule the whole kingdom. But Alexander, who was too busy conquering places to learn how to untie knots, simply drew his sword and cut the Gordian Knot in two. This was cheating, of course, but Alexander had too many soldiers for Gordius to argue, and soon everybody in Gordium had to bow down to You-Know-Who the Great.
Ever since then, a difficult problem can be called a Gordian Knot, and if you solve the problem in a simple way—even if the way is rude—you are cutting the Gordian Knot.
The moral of World War One is “Never assassinate Archduke Ferdinand.”
