Watching the English

by Kate Fox

socially integrative, egalitarian environments,

The primary function of drinking-places is the facilitation of social bonding.

structured, temporary relaxation or suspension of normal social controls (also known as ‘legitimised deviance’ or ‘time-out

out behaviour’). It

the bar counter of the pub is one of the very few places in England where it is socially acceptable to strike up a conversation with a complete stranger.

normal rules of privacy and reserve are suspended,

temporary ‘remission’ from our conventional social inhibitions, and friendly conversation with strangers is considered entire...

one of the most poignant sights of the English summer (or the funniest, depending on your sense of humour) is the group of thirsty tourists sitting patiently at a pub table, waiting for someone to come and take their order.

I explained that the sociability rule only applies at the bar counter,

Waiter service, I pointed out, would isolate people at separate tables.

the English are somewhat reserved and inhibited,

and we need all the help we can get. It is much easier for us to drift casually into ‘accidental’ chat while waiting at the bar counter than deliberately to break into the conversation at a neighbouring table.

The no-waiter-service system is designed to prom...

The division of the pub into ‘public’ and ‘private’ zones is a perfect, and very English, compromise: it allows us to break the rules, but ensures that we do so in a comfortingly ordered and rule-governed manner.

The bar counter is the only place in England in which anything is sold without the formation of a queue.

In our drinking-places, however, we do not form an orderly queue at all: we gather haphazardly along the bar counter.

there is in fact a queue, an invisible queue, and that both the bar staff and the customers are aware of each person’s position in it.

Everyone knows who is next:

queue-jumping.

but English bar staff are exceptionally skilled at identifying

who is next in the invisible...

The rules of English pub-talk regulate non-verbal as well as verbal communication

Bar staff do their best to ensure that everyone is served in proper turn, but it is still necessary to attract their attention and make them aware that one is waiting to be served.

the twitch of an eyebrow speaks volumes. The object is to make eye contact with the barman. But calling out to him is not permitted, and almost all other obvious means of attracting attention, such as tapping coins on the counter, snapping fingers or waving are equally frowned upon.

It is acceptable to let bar staff know one is waiting to be served by holding money or an empty glass in one’s hand. The

The etiquette here is frighteningly precise: it is permitted to perch one’s elbow on the bar, for example, with either money or an empty glass in a raised hand, but not to raise one’s whole arm and wave the notes or glass around.

Once eye contact is made, a quick lift of the eyebrows, sometimes accompanied by an upward jerk of the chin, and a hopeful smile, lets the staff know you are waiting.

Foreigners find the eyebrow-twitching pantomime ritual baffling – incredulous tourists often told me that they could not understand how the English ever managed to buy themselves a drink – but it is surprisingly effective.

Exception to the Pantomime Rule

in the context of the special etiquette governing relations between bar staff and regulars.

just one or at the most two members of a group to go up to the bar to order drinks for the group,

and for only one to make the actual payment.

the etiquette of round-buying, which will be covered

Second, the correct way to order a (draught) beer is ‘Pint of bitter [or lager], please.’ For a half-pint, this is always shortened to ‘Half a bitter [or lager], please.’ (When ordering a particular brand of draught bitter or lager, this would be ‘Pint of [name], please,’ or ‘Half a [name], please.’)

but omitting the ‘please’ is a serious offence. It is also vital to say ‘thank you’ (or ‘thanks’, or ‘cheers’,

The ‘And One for Yourself?’ Rule – and the Principles of Polite Egalitarianism

found that the rules of egalitarian courtesy are even more complex, and more strictly observed. For example, it is not customary in English pubs to tip the publican or bar staff who serve you. The usual practice is, instead, to buy them a drink. To give bar staff a tip would be an impolite reminder of their ‘service’ role, whereas to offer a drink is to treat them as equals.

The prescribed etiquette for offering a drink to the publican or bar staff is to say, ‘And one for yourself?’ or ‘And will you have one yourself?’ at the end of your order.

offer must be clearly phrased as a question, not an instruction, and should be made discreetly, not bellowed out in an unseemly public display of generosity.

the bartender are having a drink together, that the bartender is being included in the ‘round’. I observed that the English also tend to avoid using the word ‘buy’. To ask, ‘Can I buy you a drink?’ would in theory be acceptable, but in practice is rarely heard, as it carries the suggestion that money is involved.

To many foreign visitors, the ‘And one for yourself?’ ritual seems like an unnecessarily circuitous and complicated way of giving a tip

hypocrisy: almost by definition, it involves pretence.

We are, perhaps more than many other cultures, intensely conscious of class and status differences.

we all agree to pretend that nothing so vulgar as money or so degrading as ‘service’ is involved in the purchase of drinks in a bar.

It is not that sociability and equality are peculiar to English drinking-places, but that the contrast with our conventional norms is more striking, and that, perhaps, we have a greater need for the drinking-place as a facilitator of sociable egalitarianism – as a liminal world in which the normal rules are suspended.

This pub constitution prescribes equality, reciprocity, the pursuit of intimacy and a tacit non-aggression pact.

This sort of pointless, childish fight-picking might appear to be in contravention of the pub ‘constitution’, with its prescription of intimacy and non-aggression, but the fact is that arguing, for English males, is a crucial element of the pursuit of intimacy. The pub-argument allows them to show interest in one another, to express emotion, to reveal their personal beliefs, attitudes and aspirations – and to discover those of their companions. It allows them to become closer, more intimate, without acknowledging that this is their purpose. The pub-argument allows them to achieve intimacy under the macho camouflage of competition.

The English male-bonding argument also shares many features with similar practices in other cultures: all such ‘ritual disputes’ involve a tacit non-aggression pact, for example – in effect, an understanding that all the insults and attacks are not to be taken too seriously. What is distinctively English about the English version, it seems to me, is that our natural aversion to earnestness – and specifically our predilection for irony – makes this understanding much easier to achieve and to maintain.

2

you spend some time eavesdropping in pubs, you will notice that English pub-talk often exhibits the same qualities as free-association sessions, which may help to explain its socially therapeutic effects.

1

The free-association rule states that pub conversations do not have to progress in any kind of logical or orderly manner; they need not stick to the point, neither must they reach a conclusion.