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To the women who are still waiting on their person, this one is for you. May he be brave May he be strong May he be bold May he be kind May he be gentle May he be consuming in the best ways May his heart be big and pure May his intentions be good May his home be your safe haven May his world be adventurous
May his eyes be your undoing May his dick be the perfect place to land g.
Remember, baby, a man’s foolish ways are not a measurement of your love or what you deserve. There’s only one man who has the power to measure any part of your life at any point. His name is Jesus. Find peace knowing that Phillip has lost the best thing that he could’ve ever wished upon a star for. You are more than this situation. You are more than the pain you feel right now. You are loved. You are appreciated. You are worthy. You are healed. I declare it for you,
“Do you understand? Rope results in nasty burns on the skin that I simply don’t want you to experience. But if you insist on being defiant, I will make sure you feel every—” Please. Tie me down. Gag me. Fuck m—
“You have so many demands for a man I don’t know.” I huffed, tossing the cover back and sitting up. “You follow them well.” His response left me speechless. My eyes rushed to find his orbs in the darkness. He wavered none. His gaze emphasized his statement.
Bigger My love was so much bigger than us Between us two, there wasn't enough room I had to find somewhere else to pour it all So, I found my way to the sea It clashed with the waves Buried itself in the sand Danced with the reefs That's... That's what healed me
“In approximately two hours, will you still be here? Or will you be near, at least?” Nervous chuckling exited me.
“Where do I need to be?”
“Where do you want me?”
The gap between us closed. He was close, too close. So close that I could feel the heat from his skin against mine. “Here.” I gasped, trying to control the irregularities happening in my body at once. “Then, I’ll be here.”
“Dinner will be ready in a little under two hours. Please maintain an appetite.” “Anything, Pretty.”
“Not long enough, apparently. I won’t hold you from your bed too long. I just want to feed you, and then I’ll be on my way.” It isn’t food I hunger for. Neither is it water that’ll truly quench my thirst. I thought.
“I’m in no rush for bed.” Admittedly, I wasn’t. The nap had been much needed. Now, I felt fine. “Disobeying me makes that statement rather contradicting.”
Mercer made himself comfortable in the chair meant for the head of the house. He sat at the end, making a statement that his mouth hadn’t. Didn’t need to, either. His aura said everything that needed to be said. His actions fell in line.
Very BDE
“I haven’t worked up much of an appetite,” I murmured, feeling the muscles in my face tighten along with my chest. “I have.”
The illusion I assumed I was wrapped in was a reality that I was faced with upon hearing the buckle of Mercer’s pants loosen. He stalked the hardwood floor with conflict written across his features. “Food isn’t my source of supply.”
He rounded the table. The slow stride was evidence he wasn’t in a rush. When he was ready, he made it back to me. “It’s you.” Right in front of me, he stopped, loosening the button of his jeans.
I wrapped my hands around his biceps, holding on tightly as my body grinded against his fingers involuntarily until all movement ceased. Lines crinkled my forehead. “Wh—” “When I need your help, I’ll ask,” Mercer told me. His hand was around my neck within a few seconds. This time, he held it tighter.
Pretty titties. Pretty pussy. Just Pretty. But I’m not interested in the pretty parts of you right now, Vallei. I am in search of your depths. The filthy, downright disgusting parts. Can you tap into them, or should I go fishing until I find them?”
“If you could be anywhere in the world right now,” I probed. “Where would it be?” Mercer lifted from the sheets. Carefully, I stalked his every move. Not many were made. He settled between my legs, pressing a thumb against my clit. “Is she sore?” “A little,” I confessed. “Then, it’s best I made her feel better.” The words slipped from his mouth as he slipped inside of me. “Meeeeerrrcer.” “You asked, Pretty.” Not comprehending, I petitioned for an explanation.
He lifted his fingers, spreading them so that mine had room to fit between. He then sealed the connection by making a fist. When he brought the back of my hand to his lips, our eyes met briefly. God, he’s perfect. I sighed, closing my eyes. He’s perfect.
I love when men do this
He was as glorious as the rain after too many days of sunshine. He was as gratifying as the summer breeze during the first bike ride of a busy week. He was love. He was light.
I’ve never been truly, utterly cared for… taken care of. I’ve never been enamored. Adored. Flawed and all. I’ve never been admired to this degree. I’ve never been… prayed for.
“He’s too much. He’s so much. He just keeps revealing things I’ve been so afraid to face, things I’ve been too blind to see… things that I’ve been too fearful to address. And it’s making me hurt everywhere while feeling so good at once.”
After washing my body in the shower, he oiled me down. I opened my eyes to find him hovering over my belly with his eyes closed and his head bowed.”
“Anything you need. Anything you want. Anything to make you feel better. Anything to make you feel good. Anything to keep you smiling. Anything to keep you protected. Anything… So tell me, why the tears? I don’t like them.”
Craving physical touch to be re-centered as an introvert was a habit I quickly picked up on of hers. I marked it in the Book of Vallei that I’d begun the moment I saw her pretty face. Pages were rapidly filling. Each chance I got, I’d study my content to strategize and plan a future full of happiness for the main character of my book. The only character in my book.
“I’m a nigga that gets shit done. One that will move mountains. Dry seas. Calm storms. Start riots if that’s what it takes to make sure shit goes my way. It’s the only thing I’ve ever done. This is the first situation where my hands are tied. And this motherfucker, right here, ain’t making it no better for me.” He pointed to his chest.
So, I need you to chill, Pretty. Because when you call, I’m coming. “When you cry, I’m dropping everything to see ’bout you. When you need me, I’m there. When you miss me, I will cross the ocean to get to you. I’m invested; heart, dick, and dome. I need you to understand that. You have control of me.
“The one that has you ready to pull every braid out of your head and hold your ass in the air, hoping he smells your arousal miles and miles away ’cause your cat in heat. The man that will have your ticket to heaven revoked, though you’re a literal angel.
“Nothing more is needed. Not a ring. Not a wedding. My vow to Mercer won’t need a minister present to make it official, you know? My vow to love him every day once this is over won’t require a wedding dress or a bridal party.
The first item removed was a set of cuffs, completely taking me by surprise. I choked on the liquid I’d been sipping. Patting my chest, I tried to gather my bearings. Mercer paused momentarily, making sure that I wasn’t coughing up an actual lung. I nodded to let him know that I was okay, though I was struggling to catch my breath. Next was a blindfold. Then, nipple clip. Kegel balls. A small vibrator. And a rod that extended when he stretched it. On each end was a set of ankle cuffs.
“To take her back to the crib and fuck her until she feels better until she forgets all the time she wasted waiting for a nigga who was never meant for her to get his shit together. Then, I want to cook her dinner, feed her, and then fuck her some more. You know, shit that you don’t have the privilege of doing.”
“Check this shit out,” I started, placing a thumb on my nose. “If you try any slick shit in her absence, I’m on your ass. If you try to file for divorce in her absence, I’m on your ass. If you touch her accounts in her absence, I’m on your ass. “If you dial her line, I’m on your ass. If you even think about her too much, I’m on your ass. Hear me very fucking clearly when I say that there is no such thing as a crazy ex when I’m in the picture. I’m the only crazy one in this shit.
“There’s something about when Black women unite. We can move mountains. We’re no strangers to solutions. It’s the most beautiful, unfiltered experience ever, witnessing Black women laugh loudly and step fully into who we are as we dine, sip, and converse. We heal one another. As much as I like my quiet, I love our energy. Right now, it’s what I need to push through this moment.”
“I wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.” “Then don’t worry about shit changing because it won’t. The day that I can’t love you properly, I’ll leave. I’m a grown-ass man who can use his words. Before I break you down or break your spirit, I will break my own heart and walk away. I pray that day never comes, but we’re human, and life is unpredictable. But if I have anything to say about it, I’m here until they shovel the dirt over me.”
Flour Egg Olive oil Salt Juice from spinach (for color)
“It’s not just that I love you. That’s putting this shit mildly. I’m in love with you. I’m indebted to you. I’m invested in you. I’m interested in you, your dreams, your wants, your needs, your hurt, your pain, your happiness, your well-being, your health, your ever… your everything. “And with every second, I’m increasingly in awe of the woman you are, the strength that you have, and all that you’ve achieved while remaining truest to who you are. You’re a fucking gem, baby. Nothing
“The Boy’s Club is where fantasies meet reality.”
