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There would be no more crying, especially not over a man who didn’t see me. Didn’t understand my value. Couldn’t discipline himself enough to stop inflicting pain on me. Refused to right his wrongs and free me from the cage he’d locked me in. Those days, they didn’t exist in my world anymore.
My fragility was never supposed to be in jeopardy. My softness was never supposed to be up for sale. My vulnerability, my sensitivity were not tailored for the auctioning block they’d been on for two years. Reclaiming it all was my new destiny.
There's no amount of dick No amount of love That can corrupt or reconsider what I mean to myself Or to the world
He cared to know my desires and tiptoed toward them, slowly, at his own pace, intensifying my yearning and making it feel utterly outstanding to receive them.
But women like her didn’t need very long. They’d come into your world like a thief in the night and take parts of you that you couldn’t get, and hardly wanted, back. They left lasting impressions. They imprinted on you. They marked their territory without fail.
“I’m no boy. I’m a grown-ass man. If you’re going to play with me, turn your pretty ass around and walk right back inside. But if you understand that there is no choosing and I’m your only option from this moment forward, then we can ride.”
“I care to know more than I already know. I care to feel more than I already feel. I understand the sacrifice I’m making. I just don’t want to do it in vain… or alone.”
“Then I’ll be here to remind you who the fuck you are and what you deserve before I introduce you to some shit that you won’t ever be able to recover from. Type of shit that makes your chest hurt, and your cheeks burn at the thought. Type of shit that you’ll find nowhere else, nowhere but here. Nowhere but home ’cause that shit ain’t a place.”
“That shit is reserved for a woman that is all mine,
He was as glorious as the rain after too many days of sunshine. He was as gratifying as the summer breeze during the first bike ride of a busy week. He was love. He was light.
I’ve never been truly, utterly cared for… taken care of. I’ve never been enamored. Adored. Flawed and all. I’ve never been admired to this degree. I’ve never been… prayed for.
There was something about a woman who followed orders so graciously and without question, allowing you to take the lead, not because she didn’t have another choice, but because she trusted you, and it felt most natural to allow you to guide her.
“It’s been the hardest two weeks of my life, going on as if you don’t exist. You never existed. And I haven’t been experiencing parts of you that are memorable. I’ve missed you every day so much it hurts.”
“But I could never pretend that you don’t exist. Because you’re right here, even when you’re not around.”
She landed as softly as I wanted her living. Hardships were part of her past. From the moment I met her moving forward, I’d been making plans to soften every area of her life.
There was something special, something beautiful about the way rain announced itself before its arrival.
Making you mine, with no restrictions or connections to anyone else, that’s all that matters right now,
“I’m choosing to be proactive and avoid what could be the dismantling of something so beautiful, so necessary.
“I’m a nigga that gets shit done. One that will move mountains. Dry seas. Calm storms. Start riots if that’s what it takes to make sure shit goes my way.
“When you cry, I’m dropping everything to see ’bout you. When you need me, I’m there. When you miss me, I will cross the ocean to get to you. I’m invested; heart, dick, and dome. I need you to understand that. You have control of me.
Somehow, someway, I felt as if I loved him too much.
My vow to love him every day once this is over won’t require a wedding dress or a bridal party.
There’s no point in that cute face if there’s only air upstairs. We’re looking for proficient, polished employees. Not pretty ones. I understand wanting to snag a high roller, but she won’t be doing that here. We might lose him as a client if the pretty waitress can’t even remember he said no scallops on his dish because he’s allergic.”
I’m trying to be a kept nigga, baby. You can keep me if you want me.
“You don’t need to understand. You need to listen.”
“Love isn’t something you have to force, Phillip. It’s the most natural thing to ever exist. It’s automatic. It doesn’t need much influence. You won’t have to try and try and try. It’ll just happen.
Phillip, just be quiet. Please. My head is throbbing, and every word you speak is making my stomach turn.”
Because why was Phillip still talking?
“There’s something about when Black women unite. We can move mountains. We’re no strangers to solutions. It’s the most beautiful, unfiltered experience ever, witnessing Black women laugh loudly and step fully into who we are as we dine, sip, and converse. We heal one another.
Waking up to him had never felt better.
“It’s not just that I love you. That’s putting this shit mildly. I’m in love with you. I’m indebted to you. I’m invested in you. I’m interested in you, your dreams, your wants, your needs, your hurt, your pain, your happiness, your well-being, your health, your ever… your everything.
“Your soul is pure. Your heart is gold. Your intentions are good. Don’t ever change that, Pretty.”
