Jacked Up

by Latrexa Nova

This feels like a personal attack

Tears do too—out from my eyes, obviously, not my pee hole. What a feeling, to be leaking at both ends.

Thirty-five is a geriatric birth. Isn’t that nuts?”

YES IT IS FUCKING NUTS AND MY 35 YO ASS HATES IT

Jacques Spookteau

Top tier

I just had a flashback to high school and the smell of black clove cigarettes 😂

Shoot, I’m depressing my imaginary friend.

he finger banged me so good I woke up from the orgasm. These are not things that happen to normal people.

But like what’s the worst it could be?” I cheer, throwing my hands up in the air. “Murder,” he says quickly.

And really, I mean, if I really think about it, what has not murdering people gotten me?

Fair

“Aw, honey, it’s okay. I’m just killing you so my recently animated boyfriend can live.”

“How will stealing from the rich help restore me to my natural state?” I grumble. “No, idiot, we’re going to kill more people.” “Oh, goody!”

People find this amusing? I’m a demon and it’s terrifying.

Re: clowns

Delicious soul soup.

“It’s like mint and chili powder and smoke. So tingly.”

💦

What good are your morals when my cock is inside you?”

This is a rutting, not a romance.

“What, you never got fucked so good you started crying?”

“The course of fate is I’m gonna kick you in the fucking dick, you asshole!” I screech.

“Jack!” she screams. “Don’t let go!”

That door was big enough for the both of them