If You Hate Me

by Helena Hunting

His free hand slides into my hair and curls into a fist, holding my head. “You know what they say about playing with fire.” He twists my head, his lips dragging across my cheek until they reach my ear. “Bad little Bea,” he taunts, catching my earlobe between his teeth.

“You don’t want my attention, Beat.” His voice is soft and menacing, sending a shiver down my spine. “I promise you, you’re playing with fire, and I will fucking incinerate you.” I smile. “That sounds like a challenge.” His expression grows sinister. “Oh, little girl, you have no idea what you’re signing on for.”

I pat Tristan on the chest. “Game on, big boy.”

And this kiss, this one fucking kiss is everything I didn’t want it to be. It’s not like any other. We’re years of history colliding. Her mouth on mine is a balm, and desperation has me tipping her head so I can deepen the kiss. I shouldn’t be doing this, but I can’t stop. All I want is more.

“You’re a vindictive little thing, aren’t you?”

She gives me an incredulous look. “I don’t even like you.” It’s what I need to hear. It stings, but I’ve mostly been a complete asshole to her, so I can’t expect any different. I push down the regret. She doesn’t deserve my vitriol. It’s not her fault she’s a constant reminder me of all the things I wish I deserved. “Good. I’ll make sure it stays that way.”

“Listen to how wet your pussy is for me. You pretend to be so sweet, but you’re a dirty girl, aren’t you? And I’m going to make you filthy.”

“Every time you think about the things I’ve done to you, and you’ll think about them often—” Probably with regret. “—you’re going to wish I’d taken your ass, too. And it’s going to drive you fucking mad that I didn’t, because you’re too inexperienced to handle me.”

“I get it. I get why you said no,” he tells me softly. “I just wanted you next to me. I hated last night. I didn’t want you to have to listen. I won’t be with anyone else while I’m gone. I haven’t and I won’t. I don’t want anyone else. There’s only you, okay? You’re the only one.” His eyes are wild. Haunted almost. He takes my hand and presses it against his cheek. “Just don’t go. Please, Bea? Don’t leave yet. I’m not done with you. I need more of you.”