Theoretically Straight
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Read between January 8 - January 18, 2025
2%
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I’m beginning to wonder if becoming an adult—particularly a Christian adult—will primarily consist of feeling guilty all the time.
6%
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“Right, all I’m saying is that I don’t want to see tiddies for the sake of tiddies. Give me tiddies with backstory. Tiddies with heart. Fully-developed-as-characters tiddies. I think I just really enjoy saying the word ‘tiddies.’”
7%
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“I realized that a boy I thought was flirting with me at school was really just existing near me while not actively trying to assault me. A common mistake.”
7%
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“It’s not fair. Why am I only interested in the boys who can never like me back? It’s like a curse. I’m forever doomed to unrequited crushes.”
10%
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“You may be too young now, but at some point, you’re going to face a moment where you have to choose to fight for what matters to you. You won’t want to ‘suck it up’. You won’t want to compromise. You won’t care about keeping the peace. If you believe in something enough, it won’t even be a question in your mind: you’ll fight for it.”
13%
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I laugh at an awkwardly loud volume. Shi–crap, that was too loud. Now it’s weird. Now he’s going to think I’m uncomfortable. Why would I be uncomfortable? Because I’m secretly gay or something? Obviously, I’m not, but even if I was, Oliver wouldn’t care if I was gay—none of my friends would.
Leena Rodriguez
Bro sounds like a nervous wreck
21%
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If there was a ghostly presence that only my phone camera was able to pick up, that might explain why I felt so weird last night—why I still feel weird even now.
Leena Rodriguez
Bitch be so for real (¬_¬)
22%
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This is it. I’m going to be the one yelled at this morning. I’m going to get grounded. Dad’s going to take my phone away and never let me make another TikTok again. He’s going to take the keys to Eileen away. He and Mom are going to drag me to our pastor and have him exorcize the demons out of me. Maybe he should. Maybe I deserve it. I’m the one who broke the rules. I’m the one that messed with forces I didn’t understand. I’m the one–
Leena Rodriguez
This dude needs to chill out
27%
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What if I am just crazy?
Leena Rodriguez
No you're just gay
27%
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As I picture Caleb laughing, however, my stomach does this weird swooping thing—almost as if I’m riding a rollercoaster. Huh. That’s new. Maybe I should add that to the ever-growing list of “Weird Things I’ve Felt Since Accidentally Recording Ghost Orbs.”
Leena Rodriguez
He is so dumb
27%
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Leena Rodriguez
How is he this dumb(¬_¬)
28%
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Leena Rodriguez
Yea there is its called a crush
34%
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Oh my God.
Leena Rodriguez
Finally
34%
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The question, the realization, the dread of what I may or may not have just discovered is threatening to pull me under very quickly.
37%
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Maybe… Maybe we should only hold hands in secret, then. Just in case someone gets the wrong idea and thinks we’re doing something wrong. Because we’re not doing anything wrong. And if we’re not doing anything wrong, then what’s the risk? And if there’s no risk, what am I so afraid of?
37%
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It’s enough. I’ll take it.
40%
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But is it in an “I like hanging out with you, bro” way or an “I want to hold your hand and maybe make out with you in the basement” kind of way?
40%
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or the way his eyes crinkle when he smiles every time I walk into the freaking room,
42%
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He has a lot of freckles. So many little freckles… They remind me of stars in the night sky.
42%
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I could probably take a marker and trace little constellations in those freckles. I can almost see them now if I look hard enough. Orion’s belt. Cassiopeia. The Big Dipper.
Leena Rodriguez
Hes just in his own world called caleb
43%
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It’s actually really cute, and I can’t stop myself from picturing myself doing the same thing if Caleb was on a tube. Shit.
46%
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Oh my god, is this happening? Is this what I think it is? I’m not ready. Or maybe I am? I don’t know. I need more time to think about it. Or maybe I don’t?
Leena Rodriguez
Its not its about ghosts
46%
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Before I even realize what I’m doing, my hand hooks around the nape of Theo’s neck, and I close the distance between us, pressing my lips to his.
Leena Rodriguez
Thank god he made the first move
47%
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Through the frosted window panel beside the door, Theo’s headlights come back on, and a few seconds later, they’re gone. He’s gone. And it’s all my fault.
Leena Rodriguez
Aw poor caleb
47%
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It was never the orbs. It wasn’t a dark spirit or some ghost bullshit that I so desperately tried to believe in. Of course it wasn’t.
Leena Rodriguez
Finally he grew a brain
51%
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“I’m fucking scared. How can I go my entire life thinking of myself as one way, and it completely changes overnight?
53%
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Caleb grins, sly and skeptical at first, but then I start belting out the lyrics in a remarkably bad British pop accent, and it’s not long before he’s laughing. His laughter makes my chest swell, and it’s by far the best music I’ve heard all day.
54%
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“I want him to worry about figuring out his own stuff first. Then we can talk about what the two of us are doing.”
61%
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“Oh, okay. Cool.” Theo looks quickly at me, then grabs the book, bringing it over and sinking onto the floor beside me. “Don’t feel like you have to,” I tell him. “How come I don’t get to say no?” Freddy asks. Wren snorts a laugh. “Because you’re already my bitch.”
Leena Rodriguez
Lol
72%
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I almost feel dizzy watching him, heat rising in my cheeks. Am I…Am I turned on by this?
Leena Rodriguez
stop i love him so much
73%
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There is not a single doubt in my mind that I’m in love with Caleb Raynard.
85%
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“I love him, and I don’t want to lose him. Please don’t take him from me.”