Unhinged (Dance With My Demons, #1)

by Steph Macca

"Kind of. Rather, an attachment of sorts. Someone you hold and value above others, that you feel drawn to, and want to confide in. But at the same time, worry you'll disappoint them. Often there's a fear that the 'favorite person' will leave, triggering abandonment fears."

is he talking to me or you?

"You can't hide from me forever," Grey whispers in a sing-song voice from his desk. "I'm not hiding," I say confidently, ignoring him unsuccessfully. "I just don't want to play games." Grey snorts. "Is this because I asked about your prudish reaction?"

lol

"Aww, babe. You're so cute when you're mad."

"You want me to tattoo you?" I blurt out. "Are you insane?" Theo looks at me, all seriousness on his face. "Yes." Of course he's insane. He's more than insane — he's fucking unhinged. "I can't do that," I mutter quickly, trying to hand the needle back to him. He grabs my hand, squeezing it closed around the needle. Gripping me, he pierces the skin on his arm, not flinching. "Like this," he directs, holding my fist as he shows me the depth of the needle.

"Go on. Try again," he coaches. Speechlessly, I carefully hold his arm with my free hand, guiding the needle into a new spot. My stomach churns as I spot a new droplet of blood emerge from the pierced skin, staining his flesh maroon. Theo doesn't flinch or show any signs of discomfort and I pause, checking his face for guidance. "Is this okay?" "A little deeper," he points out, nodding when I push a little harder. "Now, go to the next spot."

"I have these ugly ass scars that I can't stand to look at. Even if I got surgery, it would never hide them fully. So, I figured maybe a tattoo would disguise it. Or at least, distract me when I have to look at them." Theo stays quiet, and I feel embarrassed at admitting it to him. He's probably annoyed at hearing a sob story, regretting the invite to hang with him. When his hand reaches out to me, I freeze, terror unfolding as he grabs my bandaged wrist. Sensing my reaction, he knows he's on the right track. I pray that he pulls back, but when he starts unraveling the bandage, my body starts shaking with all the trauma and memories.

Through the silence, I hear the sound of plastic before a beeping noise reaches my ears. Staring in shock and horror, the door slowly opens, revealing Grey. "Hello, beautiful. Are you ready?" "Are you insane?" I gasp. Grey tilts his head, smiling innocently. "We've already been over that. Now, come on or we'll be late." "Late for what?" I ask, not moving. "Now that will spoil the surprise. And there's only one thing I like spoiling. So, move your ass and follow me."

i- okay

When we turn the corner and head towards the library, I'm surprised to find an orange glow cascading out of the cracks in the door. He pauses before he opens it, looking at me. "Now remember what I said. Keep an open mind. Just do what we say and everything is good. But you're safe." "That's not overly reassuring," I mutter, my stomach clenching. Grey grins. "Trust me. You'll be fine."

His eyes immediately lock onto us as we enter, honing in on me as I linger behind Grey awkwardly. His mouth pulls into a tight line, his disapproval obvious, but Grey clutches my hand, squeezing it as we approach. "Grey," Damon greets, not taking his eyes off me. Grey lets go of my hand, putting his arm around my shoulders like I'm an old friend. "Is everyone here?" Damon nods. "Let's begin."

consider me nervous

"Why is there one random red curtain and the rest all black?" I ask curiously. Grey looks over, nodding. "That's the exhibition aisle." "The what?" He grabs my hand, dragging me towards it. I hastily shove the rest of the strawberry in my mouth before he pulls back the curtain, pushing me inside. I'm not sure what I was expecting, but it wasn't this. Inside the aisle there's three people inside. Two of them are stark naked, banging against the shelves, while the third is naked with her ass against the wall. And judging by her face twisted in pleasure, there's something else happening that I can't see. "Glory hole," Grey points out at my confusion. "What?" I breathe out. He laughs, leaning against the shelf as he watches her grind her hips. "It's a glory hole. It's connected to one of the rooms next to the library. There's a hole in the wall."

WHAT

"Yeah, there's a dude on the other side. Damon picks them. It's for people who want to fuck but don't have someone already lined up. It's a public service really." My eyes widen as her body starts to shake, her mouth falling open into an O shape. Her fingers brush against her clit and I'm mesmerized when she cries out. The girl falls to her knees, panting and behind her I can finally see the glory hole in all its… glory.

i-

"But it wasn't consensual." I can't bring myself to look at him. He already knows the answer — he always does. Shaking my head slowly, I confirm it for him, immediately feeling all the hate and disgust for myself like I did that night. "Who?" he asks, his voice sharp. There's no playfulness anymore, just darkness as he demands answers. "I don't know," I tell him honestly. "One of my father's friends. They were drunk. My father lost a bet and apparently I was the prize. I don't remember much."

"Well, I can guarantee no one here will ever touch you like that. I'll make sure of it. In fact, it's one of Damon's rules. We don't take kindly to rule breakers." "Good," I manage to say, hugging myself. His face softens as he takes in my broken pitiful position. He shuffles over to me, sitting next to me. I don't even flinch as our arms brush. He reaches down, cupping my hand in his. "There's nothing to be afraid of here."

Before I realize I'm moving, I lean forward, pressing my lips to his. Grey responds immediately, kissing me back gently. I can sense he's letting me control it, and the action doesn't go unappreciated.

"Thanks," I say, flustered. "No, thank you," Grey grins. "You taste sweet like trouble and danger." Sitting back, I look away shyly. "It's the strawberries." "Hm," he agrees. "Come on, let's get you some more food. We need to satisfy that appetite."

"You might not have done it, but your hound dogs did," Siobhan grunts, being shoved into the wall face first. "And Vivian is out for blood now."

rd well let her come cause she dtm

"There was an incident earlier today," he starts, annoyed. "Several people were involved in an altercation in the hall. As a result, there will be no free time today or for the next three days. Meals will be delivered to your rooms and all classes are temporarily suspended."

bruh

"Useful? Like getting us all punished?" I tsk at him, waving my finger playfully. "Come on now. That wasn't her fault. Whatever drama is happening with Hallman and his little bitch, that was out of her control. Besides, it started with us."

"She's been through Hell, Damon. Imagine what will happen when she finally takes hold of that pain and runs with it. Imagine what she can become." "She could be a living nightmare." I snort. "I hope so. The possibilities are endless."

get you a man who believes in your growth <3

It sounds bad, I admit. But it's not. Avery is so desperate to please and have someone smash through that tough outer shell she hides behind. As soon as I do, she'll be able to really shine.

"You're infuriating, Grey. Your savior complex will be the end of you one day." "Aww, are you worried about my wellbeing?" I taunt.

I swing open the door and stare into the darkness. "Knock knock, little killer." "Grey?" she answers hesitantly through the abyss. "The one and only."

lol hey bae

"What are you doing here?" she asks anxiously. I move through the room, having memorized it by now. Pausing at the side of the bed, I can sense her next to me. "I came to visit. Thought you might be lonely," I tell her. She doesn't respond so I sit down on the edge, my hand sliding along the mattress until I find her leg. She twitches when our skin touches but I'm surprised that she doesn't pull away.

aw arent you sweet

"Besides, I've already gotten everyone in trouble. The last thing we need is to be caught." My blood boils at her words. How dare she think that? Of course she blames herself. Absolutely typical symptom and characteristic of Avery. "Don't you dare," I warn her gently. "That is not your burden to bear. You're the victim. And believe me, when this period is over, there will be consequences for Vivian."

yeah bae get that bitch

"Avery," I say sternly. "You need to realize that there are rules here. And then there are rules. She started this mess. Her and her pathetic little boyfriend have no one to blame but themselves. And I won't have you taking their misery and making it your own. Do you understand me?" I squeeze her leg again to emphasize my point. "Okay," she mutters finally in a quiet voice. "Good," I grin, my tone returning to cheery.

"The part where you kissed me," I casually point out. "I think we should talk about this." Avery squirms uncomfortably. "You're right. I'm sorry. I shouldn't have done it." "No," I start. "You should have done it sooner. You deserve the finer things in life, and like I said, there's certain things I like to spoil.

Before she can say anything, I find her in the dark, pushing her backwards onto the bed. I lean over her, holding my weight above her. Through the darkness, I start to see the faint outline of her as my eyes adjust. Her breathing is getting a little heavier, and I take note of it, looking for the little body signs.

oh gosh

"I want to try something," I say. "But I need your permission to do so." Avery reaches for my arm, her hand grabbing my forearm as I stay above her. "What is it?" she asks curiously, with an undertone of fear. Leaning down, I feel her breath on my face, and judging by the sharp suck of air she does, she can feel mine too. "I want to touch you." "You are touching me," she points out, redirecting the awkward tension that only she feels. Laughing softly, I find her lips, brushing mine over hers in a tease. "I want to touch you… here," I say, my hand lightly caressing the front of her shorts.