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“I asked for a piano and cello,” Ama said. Jacob stood from the piano bench. “Your assistant’s email asked for this duo, and this duo is piano and violin.”
She stood to greet this “Alex,” and her muscles froze in place when Xander Thorne turned toward her, cello case hanging from his thick arm. Alex. She’d never thought his name was actually Xander Thorne, but…
she tried not to dwell on the fact that she was playing on Xander Thorne’s spare cello. Or the fact that she would not have worn a knee-length skirt if she’d known she would have a cello between her knees. Xander Thorne’s cello. No, no. Don’t think about Xander Thorne’s anything between your knees.
If Gwen had been living with a stranger, she never would have survived the close quarters, but Jacob had practically been her soulmate since sophomore year of high school. She’d thought they’d maybe fall in love one day, until he came out to her one champagne-hazed evening the summer after senior year. She’d hugged him and drunkenly helped create his Grindr account, excusing herself to the bathroom only twice to press back her tears. Later, she would laugh at the thought of them being in a relationship. He was a constant in her life—there for her when her grandfather passed the day before
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said, “Do you… do you want change? You can have what’s in the case—” The woman had smiled and patted her cheek. They didn’t officially meet until a year later at Mabel’s shop, but Gwen would always remember the day she first met Ava Fitzgerald, first chair for the Manhattan Pops and the most graceful and talented violinist of her time.
“I know. About… Alex.” Ava’s brows lifted. She sat back in her chair with a polite smile. “Ah. My bratty child, yes.” She paused
This was… Was this…? The sheet music was for violin. Sixteen bars of rest before the first violin notes were played. The same length as the arpeggio section. Long legato notes that synced and harmonized and counterpointed perfectly to the second section in Fugue No. 1, Unaccompanied. But… accompanied. By her.
There’s something exciting about sight-reading.
Don’t you agree? This was insane. This was absolutely— The end of the arpeggios. Two bars to decide. She scanned the page, finding accidentals and triplets and staccatos. But she knew this song. She knew it in her blood. And he wanted her to play it with him.
“Give this a chance. The two of us. I’m not good with words, I’m not good at speaking things. I’m good with notes on a page. I’m good at music—and that’s what I tried to tell you on that stage just now.” His eyes were wild on hers, and she felt the air thin, her head spin.
“If you don’t want to be with me, together with me, I can understand,” he said, and she felt her knees wobble. “But, Gwen, please make music with me. I need you in my life. I need to be in your orbit in some way, and if you don’t want me to touch you and kiss you and fuck you, then let me make love to you onstage every night because it’s the most alive I’ve felt in ten years—”
“I want to be clear,” he whispered, as she focused on the rose-colored smudges around her lips. “I want you. In every way.” She swallowed, and he watched her throat move. “I want to see you. And fuck you. And play music with you.”
Alex tearing the violin music away from her at the wedding and telling her to just play. Just play. Maybe she liked love songs after all. As long as she was playing them with Alex.
But the song didn’t have an easy ending. It was still unwritten and unperfected.
It didn’t feel like a love song anymore. It felt like yearning and hope and decaying dreams all in one piece.
She looked up at him. He was staring down at her like she was the sun. It was familiar. The same fascination she’d seen in him at the wedding, at the Plaza. Like she was an answer to a question he’d been asking his whole life. “It was remarkable, Gwen.”
“I left the tour. I quit.” His deep brown eyes bored into hers. “I couldn’t think of anything except getting here. I don’t know what I’m doing.” He laughed, running a hand over his face.
don’t know. I don’t want it anymore, Gwen. I just…” He reached up and pushed her hair over her ear. “I just want to be near you.”
“Why were you crying?” he breathed. “During the song.” She licked her lips. “I was thinking of you. And how much I still love you.” He sat up, pulling her face to his as she sat in his lap. “I love you.”
“I don’t think they are. I worked with a lawyer friend to clarify my contracts with Lorenz. He can continue to use my original arrangements for Thorne and Roses performances as long as the royalties are properly distributed. I designated my royalties to my old bandmates, including Forrest Miles, who is currently playing ‘Xander Thorne.’ The boys and I are also re-recording the tracks from our first two albums.” “‘Alex’s Version,’” Gwen hummed under her breath. Alex shoved his elbow into her ribs, and she smiled into her latte.

