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With the way she lit up when she saw me, I couldn’t have stopped the smile from spreading across my face if you’d held a gun to my head. Stepping out onto the field with thousands of people cheering for me didn’t come close to how she’d just made me feel—and that meant trouble, which was why sleeping with her was a one-way ticket to fucking up my future. You don’t sleep with girls who look at you like that and get away unscathed. Just look at my dad.
I was tired of being me, and the only way to change that was to stop being afraid of what I wanted.
Football was the drug, and I was the celebrity syringe. They were ready to use me up and toss me aside as soon as my usefulness was gone.
“Even when you try to keep things simple and easy, shit always finds a way. It’s like Jurassic Park but with way worse special effects.”
I’d give her the other firsts, as many as I could, because if I gave her too much, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself from never wanting to stop.
I’d never wanted to kiss someone more than I did right then, standing in the middle of a crowded dance floor in nothing but my Pikachu boxers, dancing with a woman who was unlike anyone I’d ever met. She’d gotten so fully and completely under my skin, I didn’t know how I’d existed before I met her.
The kiss. The kiss that had somehow blown away every other kiss I’d ever had and made me forget every pair of lips other than hers?
She was the most beautiful thing I’d ever seen. More than any win on the field, any pair of limited-edition Adidas, she was so many things, and I couldn’t even believe she was there with me.
How you could want something so much with another person? How they could hold you close and help you discover a whole different side of yourself?
Shit, I was already a goner and I hadn’t even noticed it. I loved her, and that scared the shit out of me, more than I’d even thought possible.
Her eyes glittered with a love I’d never experienced before, the kind I’d run headlong away from even the hint of, but with her, I wanted it all. I wanted even more, and that scared the ever-loving shit out of me.
Sometimes memories are all we have, and there’s no amount of money in the world that can get those back.”
