In horror, I realized I had opened myself. Alerted my father to my presence here somehow. By drawing on my magic—fueled by the markings. By leaving the safety of Camelot and its proximity to Avalon. And lastly, by carrying Excalibur with me into battle. Was the blade truly still so attuned to him that he had sensed its presence with me?
In horror you realize? HE JUST SAID ALL OF THOSE EXACT THINGS TO YOU! Why is this written like she had an epiphany and thought of all of this on her own? What is the author thinking!

