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“You remind me of honeysuckle. Nectar sweet as honey, like the sound of your voice. But the berries are deceiving—poisonous if consumed.” He shrugs playfully. “Beautiful and deadly.”
I get the feeling that Darby is the type of person who may care too much all the time. This moment is probably the most carefree one she’s had in a while, and something like pride swells inside me knowing I’ve given her that.
I wonder if he sees that fear and sorrow and finds comfort in it, if he thinks his ghosts can dance with my wolves and give us both a reprieve for a moment.
I squeeze her hand four times. I’ll. Keep. You. Safe. We jump together, free-falling into the abyss.
We stare at each other for so long I think the sun fades across the sky, the moon rises, and the sun follows it again. Flowers bloom and die in the moment we take to soak the other in.
He seems to glow when he laughs, and it feels like bells chiming in my soul.
“Don’t ever hide your smiles from me, Honeysuckle. I need to see every single one, especially the ones I put there.”
Fuck is my favorite word. It’s got like…endorphins or something. It’s physically therapeutic to say.”
She doesn’t just taste like honey. She’s sweeter. Her lips taste like the answer to every question I’ve ever asked. Her lips taste like finding faith, like realizing you believe in God for the very first time. Because how could I not?
“Leo,” she breathes. “Stop looking at me like that.” “Looking at you like what, Honeysuckle?” “Like you know exactly what my soul feels like, and you’ve been incomplete without it all this time.”
“For what it’s worth, I really did love you,” I whisper. “My word is worthless…but I loved you too.”
“You’d wait a whole year just for me to come back?” “I think I might wait my whole life for you to come back, Darby. Something tells me there would be no point in trying to move on from this, because I’d end up searching for you in every place I go, in every person I meet, aimlessly wandering until I find you again.”
“Do not go back to the girl you were before you arrived here. Do not be obedient. Timid. Submissive. You’re not just the honey, Darby. You’re the whole damn flower. Do not forget you have poison berries. You have strength, resilience, and an independent mind. You do not need to conform to anyone else’s way of living. Okay?”
“I think there is a difference between love and infatuation. Infatuation is dangerous. Obsessive. Toxic, like holding matches when you’re covered in gasoline. You know you’re going to destroy yourself—destroy each other—but you do it anyway, just because you wonder what the burn feels like.”
“It’s really beautiful,” I respond, knowing I’m staring at her, that I haven’t taken a single second to take in the scenery around me, because she’s all I see anyway.
“You don’t need a piece of my soul, Honeysuckle. You already own the whole goddamn thing.”
“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he rasps. “The moon wraps around you in the distance like a halo. You’re glowing.” He drags his fingers across my collarbone. “An angel. An angel and her demon.” I close the gap between us once more, feathering my lips over his. “A honeysuckle and her heathen.”
“Stop looking at me like that,” he whispers. “Like what?” “Like I own all the pieces of your soul. Like you’ve been incomplete all this time without them.”
It was him. It’s always been him. Maybe I can’t take back the past, but I can fight like hell for our future.
I feel him in every nerve ending. I feel him in my veins. The scar tissue left on my torn-apart soul rips open, and he pours in.
The connection between the two of us is like a bridge between souls. I only see him branding me, claiming me.
“You’re not unemployed. You’re a teacher, and it’s summer break. You’re not homeless. I’m your home.” He leans into my ear. “And you’re not engaged to that man. The next time you want to refer to yourself as engaged, you let me know, because the only person you’re marrying in this life is me.”
“You’re my ‘it for me’ person. You were my first love. Then, the one who got away. Now, you’re my ‘it was always you.’ And it doesn’t matter what happened in between, because you’re gonna be my forever person too.” He cups my face, bringing his mouth to mine. “You’re my once-in-a-lifetime kind of love, Darby.”
