Corn Daddy: A Steamed Short

by Helena Woodcock

As for those of you who just read that content warning like a shopping list, repeat after me: The corn man can be a hot guy, but the corn man is not a good guy. We don’t want to date the corn man, ok?

He was fuckable. He was definitely fuckable. Yet at this moment if Liz could have crawled over to the pumpkin patch and fashioned a pile of dirt into her immediate and personal shallow grave, she might have.

How hard is it to put on a cute fall outfit and pretend to be normal while wandering through some corn?!

This year I’ll just do it by myself. That means nobody can get me lost but myself. It’ll be symbolic. Or some shit.