I spent that whole night so miserable thinking he wanted her, thinking he’d moved on when I couldn’t, even if it looked like it from the outside. I spent the months after trying to shake it off, trying to pull myself back into the space where that old list kept me safe. But maybe it was dead even before he stepped off the plane last week. “When I say I’m still in love with you,” he says quietly, “I mean today and yesterday and this entire week. I mean at Nick and Miriam’s wedding and I mean for the past five years.” If possible, he gets even quieter, but now he’s closer so I get every word.
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