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Mary Ellis.
One of the MAAD people
Charlie
Sarah's kid
Because the name that is handwritten in at the bottom of the typed list is… Gabriel Wright.
Martin Hastings
Meredith's attorney
Side effects of OxyContin abuse: Mood swings. Anger. Difficulty sleeping. Restlessness.
“You need to find a way to let go of the guilt, or it will eat you alive.”
Or… and I can’t help returning to this again. Or it’s not a coincidence he keeps popping up in my life. I squirm at that thought, at why he might be here besides truly wanting help. Except I started this all by following him.
Is he stalking her?
Regret is like an anchor that wraps around the heart and weighs it down, keeping it from sailing free.
Quote?
“So I followed her. And caught them in the act.”
Hmm
“Not unless you count the messages you send on a dating app when you’re getting to know someone.” A dating app…
Hmmm
“You asked why I would subject myself to something that will cause me pain. It’s because I deserve it.”
Meredith
Robert,
A man Meredith is chatting with on her dating app
Matthew.
Sarah's husband
“Rebecca Jordan
A patient of Meredith's
There’s a vague familiarity to her.
Either on the dating app or one of the women Gabriel sees
But it’s not normal. In fact, her behavior is incredibly abnormal. The sort of thing that may indicate neglect and abuse in childhood. That may point toward undiagnosed PTSD or possibly even borderline personality disorder.
So maybe the question I should be asking myself isn’t Is Gabriel stalking me? but rather Why am I still stalking Gabriel?
In psychiatry terms, I suffer a somatic flashback. The photo in the newspaper the day after the accident. The pool of red blood on the white concrete sidewalk. Connor’s mangled car off to the side. The tarp covering a small body. So, so small. The Hello Kitty stuffed animal, no more than a foot from the dead little girl.
Henry Milton. He’s been with me for years. Depression. And a pathological liar.
At least, until I notice another face in the glass—one watching me.
I wonder who is stalking her. Gabriel, Robert, Dr. Alexander?
Maybe abnormal attracts abnormal, and that’s what draws me to Gabriel. Or it could be the shared trauma. Trauma sometimes bonds people, makes them cling to one another.
“No, we do a lot of things to ourselves unconsciously as a form of punishment—self-sabotage, procrastination, alienating ourselves from others. There are many different types of deprivation that can be acts of self-punishment. The harder we discipline ourselves, the more we can ease whatever feelings of guilt we have.”
A shadow walking across the graveyard toward me, silhouetted against a single streetlamp, finally makes me move. I
When I stop and glance over my shoulder, the visitor is standing where I was. At Ellen’s and Rose’s graves. Even in the darkness, I can feel the penetration of their gaze.
Hmmm
He looks me straight in the eyes. “Angry because some selfish bastard decided he was above the law and got behind the wheel and killed my wife.”
“Oh my gosh. So what did you do? Can you date a student as a professor?” “Technically it’s a violation of the code of conduct. But we kept things quiet.”
Was he the person who had watched me leave?
“Take your time and think about it. I’m sure you can find a lot of good to do with three and a half million dollars.” The moment the words come out of my mouth, everything freezes as I recognize what I’ve done. Oh God. I think I might be sick.
Jeez she is so dumb
And that’s when it hits me that I’m a little afraid. Of myself. And what I’m capable of.
But there’s definitely a person leaning against a building. As soon as I spot them, they pull up a hoodie and turn to face forward. The fabric drapes over the sides of their head so I can’t even make out a profile. But when a puff of smoke billows into the crisp air, my eyes widen. Is that…? Gabriel bought cigarettes once.
Steve.
Rebecca's new bf
Is it normal to think about someone all the time?
“I’m consumed by her. I can’t stop thinking about her. The only time I seem to be able to, you know, get hard is when I think about her.”
He shakes his head. “She’s off-limits.” “Is she… a student?” “No.” His jaw clenches.
He's talking about her
“Or maybe…” Gabriel swallows. “Your doctor.”
It’s almost like we’re playing a game. A game with no rules or boundaries. It’s thrilling and panic-inducing.
“And what happened to end your relationship with him?” “He was married.”
I’m at the corner where I told Gabriel I’d gone to get my phone fixed. He’d asked if it was the Verizon store. He’d grinned when I said yes. But there’s no Verizon store here…
I recognize it because it belonged to you. Your jersey. Your number 17. The specialty keychain I had made for you after you won the championship. I gave it to you the night we decided to start a family. And when you died, I took to carrying it around, carrying a piece of you around, a reminder…
“And that’s how it happened. That’s how my family ended up being killed by your husband.”
Mer, what if it’s not Gabriel Wright who has been stalking you the last few months, but Rebecca Jordan?”
“Rebecca Jordan was the witness who saw your husband’s car hit the Wrights.”
“Remember, we have doctor-patient confidentiality, Dr. McCall.”
Her interest in you was territorial.”
“Why did you do it? Why did you come to my office if you knew who I was? Why did you come to me for treatment?” I demand.
Grief doesn’t make sense.”
baht,
“I went to Thailand on my honeymoon. That’s why I recognized the currency. Beautiful country. Did you just get back?”
But as it turns out, she won’t be able to make it, so I’ll be going alone.”
Wait, so did he get Rebecca to stalk her on purpose?
