Feeling Good: Overcome Depression and Anxiety with Proven Techniques

by David D. Burns

Why It’s Great to Be Able to Make Mistakes 1. I fear making mistakes because I see everything in absolutist, perfectionistic terms—one mistake and the whole is ruined. This is erroneous. A small mistake certainly doesn’t ruin an otherwise fine whole. 2. It’s good to make mistakes because then we learn—in fact, we won’t learn unless we make mistakes. No one can avoid making mistakes—and since it’s going to happen in any case, we may as well accept it and learn from it. 3. Recognizing our mistakes helps us to adjust our behavior so that we can get results we’re more pleased with—so we might say that mistakes ultimately operate to make us happier and make things better. 4. If we fear making mistakes, we become paralyzed—we’re afraid to do or try anything, since we might (in fact, probably will) make some mistakes. If we restrict our activities so that we won’t make mistakes, then we are really defeating ourselves. The more we try and the more mistakes we make, the faster we’ll learn and the happier we’ll be ultimately. 5. Most people aren’t going to be mad at us or dislike us because we make mistakes—they all make mistakes, and most people feel uncomfortable around “perfect” people. 6. We don’t die if we make mistakes.