Kindle Notes & Highlights
Read between
February 27 - March 1, 2024
it occurred to her that Mikhail may prefer that fashion.
might
sturdy, gray mare,
No comma
small, leafy, green branch
No second comma
attempting to keep up with the barbarian's cooking “I'm trying
cooking.
“And whence from there, ma'am?” The knight waved ahead. “Do we continue east?”
"Whence" means "from where," not "to where". "To where" is "whither".
a wizard's school
wizards'?
mayhaps our course is decided.
mayhap or perhaps, but not mayhaps
large, green humanoids
No comma
Cornelius' eyes went as wide as dinner plates, though more like eyeball-sized dinner plates, or perhaps regular dinner plates seen from some distance away.
a man with long gray hair in a light blue robe.
I know what you mean, but the implication that it's his hair wearing the robe is an unintended piece of comedy.
But your other option 'twouldst be to
Is the inaccuracy of the pseudo-medieval dialog (by only one character) deliberate?
Council.” Yang breathed next to her.
Council,"
looking as if he coughing up a stone.
as if he was
“I thought it was a help-yourself-thing,
help-yourself thing
“Couldst we not make
If you couldst but give
“Hello, Your Highness” called
Highness,"
the Chronicler's Guild.”
Chroniclers'
“The public needs to hear all voices on the important issue of dangling innocent people in cages.” Buttercup nodded. “Some people don't realize it's a controversy at all!”
Barrels and crates piled around them.
were piled
Sir Humphrey held up a chunk of bread. “That Mayor may have the character of a toad's ass,
His dialog is suddenly not cod-medieval.
shiny, black pauldron
No comma
you had laid down on our table
lain
dirty, rust-colored robes
No comma
many weeks travel,
weeks' [compare "one week's travel"]
several days walk.”
days'
They had stumbled upon a secret passage under the Badlands.
Convenient!
“The Castle lies but a short distance ahead.” “We're close, then,” said Maryan.
Brilliant, Maryan! If it's just a short distance, you are indeed close.
“It would have to be laying on its side,”
lying
Maryan's gaze was steel and fire, together, but not so hot as to melt the steel, more like a fire that showed how hard and sharp the steel was, without actually damaging it.
small, ceramic discs
No comma
Though we knew Wizard Ignacio for only a short time before he betrayed us, he was a guiding light in the darkness. And he died doing what he loved best, backstabbing other people in pursuit of treasure.”
He put Daisy's reigns in his hands.
reins
small, earthen hut
No comma
large, brown-robed man
No comma
as she broke apart a piece of break.
of bread
small, gilded piece of paper
No comma
from councilor Wilson.”
Councilor
each others' eyes.
other's
not-yet-completely-defeated-rising-tide-of-the-undead,
No hyphen between "defeated" and "rising" (the switch point from compound adjective to noun), ideally
“Canst you find
This cod-medievalism is getting on my wick.
“'Tis there nothing else?”
large, leather-bound book
No comma
“I think if my life was hollow and unhappy I would focus on fixing it so I could be happy on my own, Prince Juan, and then maybe I'd consider a relationship with someone else.”
distant, flying fiend.
No comma
“Methinks it is, well… Less badass.”
Sudden transition from cod-medieval to modern. For humourous effect?
armored, undead knights
No comma
no-mans land
no-man's-land
choked and died on an oxen bone
choked on an ox bone and died ["oxen" is plural]
calm, healer's voice.
No comma
