Swipe Right for Monsters (Monster Match #1)

by R. O'Leary

“You know the best way to get over an ex-boyfriend…” Ashley wiggled her eyebrows. “Get under a new one!”

Hahahaha perfect advice!

“No more tequila for you two.” Leaning over the table, Nicole dragged the last shots over to her side of the table. Clearly, they had all had too much to drink if becoming a naughty juice box for loan repayment was on the table.

NAUGHTY JUICE BOX?! Omg thats gold!

“You have thirty seconds.” “One—” Ashley started ticking off on her fingers. “You need companionship outside of Miri and I. Preferably someone who provides orgasms, because we’re definitely not going to take on that responsibility.” “Hating this conversation already,” Nicole grumbled under her breath. “Shhh. Two, you don’t have a job lined up yet and I know for a fact that you can barely afford spaghetti right now.” That wasn’t true at all. She could absolutely afford the noodles… just maybe not the sauce. “Three, you’re a catch. You’re gorgeous, smart, and you have a great ass. There’s no reason you can’t find a demon or something who would want to pay your electric bill just to get a look at it.” Right… but… actually, that didn’t sound too terrible. Maybe it was the tequila talking, but it wasn’t the worst idea Ashley had ever had.

I love her friends

“Holy shit, look at that tongue!” Ashley ripped the phone out of her hand and stared. “Girl, you have got to go on a date with him.” “He’s part lizard!” “He can be part gecko and try to sell me car insurance for all I care. Imagine what that tongue could be doing to your bits right now!”

Actually loosing my shit omg fuck yes

“Okay,” she sighed. “I’ll try… but I reserve the right to say ‘I told you so’ if I get eaten by a yeti after dinner and a movie.” “Noted.” Ashley turned back to the waiting monsters. “Now, how do you feel about minotaurs?” "He's seven feet tall, Ash. If things get heated and he's... proportional... my cervix is going to end up in my lungs." “Weenie.” “I don’t want my first date in over a year to land me in the emergency room!” “They don’t call it having your guts rearranged for nothing.” “Ew.” Nicole cringed. “I’m tiptoeing out of my comfort zone here, so cut me a little slack. Let’s keep it human-ish for now.”

JESUS FUCK! Im glad i didnt read this in public, otherwise wise id have startled a few people with how loud i just cackled

She hated him. With every fiber of her being, she despised that he had ambushed her with his silly dimples and liquid gold eyes. Wasn’t it bad enough that she had to show up looking like a trash goblin who’d just rolled out of bed? No, the wolf had to look like a Greek god come to life.

Same girl, same

Another window burst open beside hers. Hawthorne stuck his head out, his long hair falling tangled around his face. The silver burned bright in the dying light as he scowled at the werewolf. “Keep it down, fuzzball!” he shouted into the shadowed yard. “Some of us have to get up early for work!” Slapping her hand over her mouth, Nicole choked on her giggles as Wes looked up at the steaming elf and let out the longest howl yet. A polished shoe sailed high through the air and smacked against his furry face. “I’m on a work call, moron!” Jasper yelled. A second loafer followed the first.

I love them. So much.

inhaling everyone bit of her scent. Wes looped an arm around her Nicole’s waist and dragged her tight against his side.

Grammar mistakes??

and fae had become important of her life.

grammar mistake

She couldn’t help but wonder—if the Red Cross was handing out earth-shattering orgasms, maybe they’d have more donors. She made a mental note to write a letter and drifted off to sleep.

Cackled loudly enough that carli gave me a look