All Folked Up (Good Folk: Modern Folktales, #3)

by Penny Reid

My life motto was: best to not have any expectations of tips, cats, or people.

“Bravery was still bravery, no matter how clumsy the execution.” ― Beau Winston, Beard in Mind by Penny Reid

“Clowns, in my experience, are like cats. They can sense when a person isn’t into them and then go out of their way to interact with that person.” ― Simone Payton, Dr. Strange Beard by Penny Reid

The breakroom was empty, assuming Louis wasn’t hiding inside one of the kitchen cabinets, ready to pop out and sass his elders.

“The condoms are for horny couples,” she repeated, louder. I sent her another glare. “Again, Tina, I’m ignorant. Not hard of hearing.”

“Age is just a number, Isaac. Don’t let age hold you back.” He lifted his cup toward me again. “Get that tattoo. Wear those miniskirts. Buy that comic book.”

Cletuss

So, yeah, I respected her a great deal. And, admittedly, I admired her. But unlike the rest of the staff, and very unlike myself, I’d been daydreaming about getting Hannah alone so I could also . . . disrespect her.

“Well, don’t un-weird yourself on my account. I like you weird.” ― Jethro Winston, Grin and Beard It by Penny Reid

“Don’t set yourself on fire trying to keep others warm.” ― Duane Winston, Beard in Mind by Penny Reid

One would think I’d be out of tears, but apparently not. Tangentially, I wondered what I could eat while I cried. Maybe a taco. Tacos and Tears would be the name of my performance art show. Or maybe Melancholy and Muffins . . .

Yes, I was a hypocrite. Most folks are. Whatever. Eat a dick, Wendy, and let me be a hypocrite.

“You know I’m not opposed to blackmail, dearest. Not at all. I’m just pointing out that any future progeny will inherit it from both sides of our family trees. Two dominant extortion genes. I couldn’t be happier.”

Lmao Cletus

“No. They’re adults.” Lowering his mouth to mine for a quick kiss, he turned us both from the balcony and used his arm around my waist to push me through the living room. “It’s not our job to rescue them from their bad decisions.”