“Declan Dumbass Kingman, if you don’t shoot your shot with Kelsey right this instant, I will take to social media and tell everyone in the world that you are a bigger wiener than Kelsey’s dog, Pooh. And I promise you, the Besties will be relentless in a shared quest to get you to ask her out. So you might as well do it now and save the universe a lot of time and effort.”
