Thinking he was gone forever had allowed me to see how strongly I felt for him. How much I wanted him. I had shown him glimpses of my darkest parts, and he had begged for more. I knew he could handle me. Passion and danger filled every moment we were together, and I loved it. I craved the chaos. But there was another side of me too, and that side needed the tenderness that I found in Eli. The parts of me that wanted Eli weren’t just crazed with lust or anger-fueled hate. Those parts still laughed and smiled. They felt cared for and loved. They felt good. My untrusting mind began to spin. It
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