Skin of a Sinner

by Avina St. Graves

To all the self-proclaimed good girls who want to be chased through the forest, then fucked by a masked man.

Uhm

(male) genital mutilation,

Hello-?

"I hate and I love. Why do I do this, perhaps you ask. I know not, but I feel it happening and I am tortured." - Catullus

Troy,

I know a kid named Troy

Frick him.

Aww she's using the baby term for 𝓯𝓾𝓬𝓴

raspberry

AIN'T NO WAY I THOUGHT IT WAS RASBERRY/IES ALL MY LIFE

You don’t know anything anymore. You don’t know anything anymore. You don’t know anything anymore.

“Go to Hell.” His laugh is pure mirth and carnal sin. “You’ll be right there with me. You’re my favorite sin.”

“Please.” “Please, who?” She sighs, but there’s no mistaking the excited tilt of her lips. “Please, Mickey.”

Read "Mickey" as "Daddy" on reflex.

I say as I stick my hand down into the ripped paper bag and pull out a book. Rejected by the Alpha.

CRYING BECAUSE AIN'T NO WAY HE GOT HER ONE OF THOSE HORNY ASS WEREWOLF BOOKS

“That’s an R18 book.”

IT'S DOGGY SMUT I HATE WEREWOLF SHIT SO MUCH

“Unrestricted access to written porn will ruin you, kid.”

Sigh. I know.

I’m getting shier

. .shyer? I dunno if that's the right spelling.

Cassie might see him elbows deep in an engine,

"Engine" was not the word I was expecting see there

This is what being loved feels like. I sink my nails into the palms of my hands because one day, I’ll stop feeling this way. I’ll no longer know what adoration looks like. He’ll do someone else’s hair and call someone else beautiful. I want to bottle this moment up, lock it away, and keep it for myself because the feeling is intoxicating. But the sad truth is that, even if I’m meant to be loved, it will never be permanent.

“Why won’t you tell—" My words end with a shriek when strong arms move behind my knees and sweep me off my feet. As it always does when it comes to Mickey, my body betrays me, and without thought, I wrap my hands behind his neck. “No!” He chuckles. “Too late. You’re at my mercy now.” I dissolve into his hold. Even though layers are separating us, we may as well be skin-to-skin. I’m on fire, and the only person who can put me out is him, even though he’s what ignited me. But this is a dangerous game. Something so simple shouldn’t unwind me so much. “Put me down right now, Roman Riviera.” I swear I hear him growl. “Do you want to find out if I have duct tape, too?”

Giggles

Fake it until you make it, right? Or at least lie to yourself until you start believing your own delusions to the point that they sabotage your life.

So real

“I’m going to see you every day, and it’s going to kill me not to pounce on you.” Mickey pushes himself onto his back and raises himself on his elbows so he’s staring down at me with a grin. “On that note, no skirts, no shorts, no low-cut shirts, and—I never thought I’d agree with the teachers—no shoulders. For God’s sake, you better put away the shoulders. They’re too tempting. And those thin little tank top straps? So breakable,” he rambles, talking so fast I almost miss what he’s saying. I'd believe him if he told me that he was drunk or high.

LMAO

“Actually, cover the ankles, too.

LMFAOOOO

We haven’t gotten our high energy dog that’s been trained to protect Bella. Or flown to Italy so she can have authentic pizza, and to Greece to relive our ancient history obsession. I’m meant to be putting three kids in her, and we’re supposed to have an unconventional wedding, where she’d wear a white dress and start crying as she walks down the aisle. I can’t die. I won’t. But I can’t fight it. The last thing on my lips when the lights go out is her name. "Bella."

“Go to Hell,” she bites out. Fiery little thing. “You’ll be right there with me. You’re my favorite sin.”

line so good I had to highlight it twice

saccharine

I love that word

Stupid things happen, like getting a splinter while cleaning up. I’m pulled onto my feet before I can inspect the damage. “Let me see,” he says as he grabs my hand.

IT'S JUST A GOD DAMN SPLINTER

Miss Independent in me curses as I surrender control to him. Having someone else look after me feels so foreign, yet familiar. I shouldn’t like it, but I do. By what has to be magic, he gets the splinter out on the first go, and then looks up at me with so much concern—as if I was the one who got shot.

JUST. A. SPLINTER.

The vermillion light from the fire

Fire does not produce an orange-red light.

“Isn’t it obvious?” I laugh dryly to myself. “Everyone leaves me.” “Not me,” he says. I fix my attention to our intertwined hands. “Never me.”

Jeremy didn't.

“R-18 books?” I ask, plucking at the carpet. A smile cracks across his face, and the old wooden floor creaks beneath our weight. “We call that contraband in prison.”

Bro.

The deep V of his hips points to the place I’ve only ever imagined—and bumped my head into far too many times.

?!

“What’s that saying? Think of the devil and he will appear?”

SPEAK of the devil, and he DOTH appear.

“Tag. You’re it.”

RUNNING THROUGH THE PARKING LOT HE CHASED ME AND HE WOULDN'T STOP TAG, YOU'RE IT, TAG, TAG, YOU'RE IT (that was the first Melanie Martinez song I ever heard and I promptly had a nightmare of it the same night.)

Tell me you love me if you want me to stop.”

that beautiful word starting with ‘V.’ Not vagina, violence.

"NOT VAGINA" I'M CRYING

something that says serum or bath explosion—I

BATH EXPLOSION????? BATH BOMB. IT'S CALLED A BATH BOMB.

I’m not sure if she heard what I said because her jaw has dropped, and her full attention is on the big guy, who is definitely getting a little too excited at our proximity to a very naked Bella. She clamps her mouth shut as her throat bobs, really doing wonders for my ego. “You can touch him. He doesn’t bite.” I smirk. “Much.”

STOP IT ISTG IT'S SO FUNNY WHEN MEN SPEAK ABOUT THEIR COCKS LIKE IT'S A FUCKING PET

Plus, all her squirming is making my dick harder—which she is getting a first-hand feel for because, in my infinite wisdom, I have managed to get her ass perfectly lined up against me.

"IN MY INFINITE WISDOM" CACKLING

“An added bonus,” she says slowly, wrapping her tongue around each syllable like she’s making sure she says it right. “An added bonus?” There’s a flare with how she says the words. And now, cue the fireworks. “An added bonus? You—” “Baby, you’re so good at repeating things.”

GIGGLES

Sighing, I cross my arms and lean away from him. “What?” “You can stay on your side of the car if you face me while you sleep and hold my hand.”

Aww

He releases me, motioning to my seat as if I’ve been dismissed. Such a little shit. The journey back to my side of the car is less than graceful. A whole bunch of awkward positioning of limbs and less than ceremonious grunts. Oh, and a brutal slap to my ass.

LMAOO

Fuck baby steps. Why isn’t she madly obsessed with me yet?

REAL

“Jane’s from Tarzan, and please don’t compare yourself to Indiana Jones. You’ll never win.” Test number two: Passed. Wait, actually, no. Now I’m a little bit jealous. What the hell does she mean that I can’t win against Harrison Ford? That’s it. She’s banned from watching movies with him in it.

GIGGLING AND KICKING MY FEET

Actually, hey, that’s an idea. Maybe I could cuff us together so she can never leave my side (aka, she’ll have no choice but to shower with me). I’m a genius. Why didn’t I think of that earlier?

Rico’s arm curls around my shoulders, crushing me against him as he leads us to the same door Roman went through. “How good was that, aye? You know, I was thinking, if you want a tattoo too, just give me a call. Imma set you up with a real good deal.” He slips a piece of paper into the pocket of my hoodie, and his older brother mutters, “Fucking idiot.” Rico smiles stupidly and continues, “Promise I’ll be gentle with you, chica. I have what some people call magic hands.” He winks as he rakes his gaze up and down my body. “Because one day they’ll disappear.”

LMFAOO

“I can take Riviera. How does the saying go? Win the fight, win the girl?” “I’m not an object.” “Don’t need to be an object to be a prize, muñeca.”

Rico rizz 🤤🤤🤤🤤

Rico—oh, Lord, help me—shoots me a lopsided grin and lifts his hands. “These magic hands? My Bella over here was just learning about how good they are.” My Bella. Oh no.

CACKLES

He holds his hand up in surrender and ignores Rico when he says, “We’re going to share a seat tomorrow.”

HH

He shudders slightly. “I told you I’d do anything for you. Don’t you ever doubt when I say I’ll win for you.” Rico wolf whistles behind me. “I’d win for you too, chica,” he pipes. “Shut the fuck up,” both Damien and Roman bark.

LMAOOO I LOVE RICO

When Roman and I arrived here and met Rico in the changing room, Roman pointed at the dark blue, borderline abusive looking bruises, then pointed at Rico, and said, “She’s mine. Touch her, and I’ll show you how artistic I can get with a knife.” It was charming, if not embarrassing, until Rico said that he’ll give me another. Roman obviously reacted very maturely to the provocation.

CACKLING

“You know, one time Riviera said my name while sleeping, and I never felt so special in my life.” Rico has been regaling me with prison stories ever since my butt hit the front-row seats.

SHIPSHIPSHIP

I’ve zoned out for half of what he’s said because I honestly don’t believe that twenty-eight different girls were writing to him, wanting to be his slutty pen pal.

Guys it was me.. I was all 28 of Rico's slutty writers

“Did you share bunk beds?” Rico whistles. “He wishes he could get all this.” I roll my eyes, settling my attention on the empty platform. “Let me guess, you were too fast for him?” His eyes twinkle. If he tells me how fast he is again, I’m going to punch him myself. “You and me, chica, we’re the real pair. Riviera ain’t got shit to what we got going.” I hum in patronizing approval.

LMFAOOO