Not in Love (Not in Love, #1)

by Ali Hazelwood

“Here I am, trying to help you out in a difficult situation, and you repay me by being surprised that I can read.”

“Your damn mouth,” he murmured, “is the most obscenely lovely thing I’ve ever had the burden of seeing.”

“It’s disconcerting.” His breath was hot on my cheek. “But in the past seventy-two hours, I’ve found myself thinking over and over that we could fuck however you wanted. For however long you wanted. Wherever you wanted. I’d consent to any and all demands, and it’d be so good that you’d probably just ruin me for the rest of my life, and I’d just sit there, grateful.” He let out a laugh. “Rue. It’s humbling, how bad I want you.”

“Out of all the people I’ve met, the things I’ve wanted, the places I’ve been, none has ever felt as necessary as you do. Because I love you. I love you in a way I didn’t think I was capable of. I love you because you showed me how to fall in love. And I don’t regret it, Rue. I wouldn’t want it any other way. Even if you can never say it back. Even if you never think about me again after today. Even if you were right after all, and you’re not capable of love.”

I was bracing for an explosion, and what I got was a four-hundred-dollar toaster.” “What the fuck?” Eli lifted his eyebrow. “Is it encrusted with diamonds?” “No. It looks like the twenty-five-dollar toaster I had in grad school.” “Fuck capitalism, man.”